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Had been dating a girl for 3 months. She initially pursued me while we were hanging around mutual friends. We hit it off immediately; spent a lot of time together doing different things. We had both recently been out of serious relationships and both expressed our desires to keep it light. We continued to see each other and began meeting each others families and developing the relationship. Eventually, we got to the stage where we both acknowledged it was becoming something more serious and we recognised having stronger feelings for each other. We seemed to connect on every level and the relationship was easy.

 

3 weeks ago she moved I to a new place. We talked regularly but saw less of each other. One day she messaged me to inform me her ex-fiance had come back into town and they had arranged to meet up (i assumed it was for them to return some items). She messaged me the next day telling me she was confused about everything that was going on and couldnt do anything serious at this time. i accepted the fate and wished her all the best.

 

A couple weeks go by and we dont talk. She messages me late on a friday night wondering if I am out with my friends. I told her i was home and she suggests stopping by. She arrives, appears to have been drinking, and discusses some other matters and then beginnings crying profusely. She tells me she made a mistake, is sorry for everything, and expresses how much she missed me and what we had. The next day she texts me telling me she doesnt know if going over was the right thing to do, she is still confused, but she misses the relationship we had and how safe she feels with me. I told her I had some strong feelings for her but respected her decision to sort herself out.

 

I have no idea what she is confused about. She claims she is not with her ex, but i assume the confusion lies somewhere between who she should pursue. Based on the short time period I am thinking the best thing to do is move on and leave her be to figure out what she wants in her life, regardless of what the outcome is. Any input on clarifying things would help immensly! Thanks!

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maybe she is confused about how to have her cake and eat it too...if you are developing feelings, I'd personally pump the brakes and let her figure it out. Sounds like she may be trouble with all this "confusion"

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Confusion means that there is someone else that she wants to be with, but she doesn't know how to keep you on the leash and make you wait while she sees what this other guy is talking about. She doesn't want to let go of either of you.

 

Time to back up off of this... she's sniffing in behind someone else and isn't into you like a girl who is into you should be.

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Confusion means that there is someone else that she wants to be with, but she doesn't know how to keep you on the leash and make you wait while she sees what this other guy is talking about. She doesn't want to let go of either of you.

 

Time to back up off of this... she's sniffing in behind someone else and isn't into you like a girl who is into you should be.

 

It's been a thought that she is definitely seeing what's going on with her ex. I have become friends with her brother in law who tells me she usually beats everything out of a relationship before moving on. They had serious issues which leads me to believe it will most likely be problematic again.

 

My gut says move on since it's becoming clear that I am a plan b. if she was into me as much as she claims I wouldn't be wondering! Actions speak louder than words!

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