Not getting it up with Prostitutes

[diamondhead]

I did post another thread but since that is on many issues, I wanted to post one with a single focus.

 

So since I have tried with 5 hookers, I have finally decided they are not for me. Obviously there is no point in spending so much money with getting nothing(no erection or pleasure) and also getting my self esteem down.

 

Is it possible that I can get it up with maybe a girlfriend but not a prostitute? Is it possible? I have no way of knowing of course.

 

weird thing is, I can get an erection at home when I am relaxed(hell I even get it twice a day) and watching some porn. Or even without watching porn, I just have to imagine a sexual situation and I can get erect. So why can't I do it with a prostitute?

 

Do many guys have this problem? Maybe not, since there are guys frequenting prostitutes and they don't seem to have any problem. I just want to know if any guys can have such kind of a problem, it is just eating me up inside.

[annie24]

A lot of men get nervous and they can't get it up. I can tell you to just relax and try to stop putting pressure on yourself.

[CeeLambrini]

Maybe it's just the realisation that these women are not having sex with you because they are in anyway attracted to you, they don't like you and they don't know you. You are paying these women to have sex with you and they have probably had at least 5 other guys have sex with them quite soon before you.

With a girlfriend, you would know that she actually wants to have sex with you, cares about you, loves you and is attracted to you.

There is no emotion or care behind having sex with a prostitute, it is all fake simply for you to get off, you are absolutely nothing special to them. To a girlfriend, you will be.

[Furbys]

You are too focused on having sex and other posters in other threads about the same topic have told you this. You need to focus on other things in life and not just sex. Because you think about it too much you are putting too much pressure on yourself therefore it wont happen.

 

I think you will be a lot better when you have sex with your future girlfriend as it will feel more natural and not robotic like having sex with a prostitute. You will be attracted to your girlfriend and she will be attracted to you.

[PaintWithLight]

What is your age?

 

Also much of sex is mental. The fact that you are trying to replicate the experience of being with a girlfriend, paying a professional who does not give a hoot about you, knowing deep inside that this is a colossal waste of money and a hit on your self esteem... all these are causing you to shut down. Now that you are 0-5 I think you should take a moment and examine what you want as far as sex and intimacy.

[louisecar]

It's likely you've only had the problem because it's with a prostitute. Stop seeing prostitutes and wait until you have a girlfriend or even a one night stand because if you keep seeing them and it keeps happening you're going to get a big hang up about it.

[ALovingKitten]

Performance anxiety? No expectations placed on you by you when alone that is why you can get an erection more easily.

[Minilogue]

Man... Just NO !!!! Enough is enough with the prostitutes, you know deep down you don't want to do with a prostitute. It's not going to make you happy losing your virginity to one of them.

 

Time to man up and change your life for the better, work on yourself and then the girls will come. Trust me on that one

[camstix]

Are you sex addicted?

 

I have no moral issue with prostitution, and if you want to, fine. No psychiatric canon I know, for instance, says doing so is a pathology.

 

You seem to spend a lot of time thinking about/craving sex. If it consumes most of your time, then this is a problem.

[pl3asehelp]

Well getting an erection and having sex are not equivalent, they're just related. Maybe you're human, have feelings, and require a deep connection with a person to be able to have sex with them. Wouldn't be so bad, would it?

[Mr_LFA]

Is it possible that I can get it up with maybe a girlfriend but not a prostitute? Is it possible?

With a gf you usually don't have that time constraint that you do with a hooker so that pressure can cause anxiety and thus difficult to maintain an erection.

 

Do many guys have this problem?

I can't speak about all guys but I've had problems on occasion with both varieties.

[diamondhead]

I just wish I was able to get it up with prostitutes. At least I could do that then.

 

This is not mu fault. I can accept that I am shy and I am not able to ask women out and all that. But not able to get it up with prostitutes? How is that my fault? I just can't accept that. I cry often and I sit at night wondering what's wrong with me. I just can't take it anymore.

[Capricorn3]

This is not mu fault. I can accept that I am shy and I am not able to ask women out and all that. But not able to get it up with prostitutes? How is that my fault? I just can't accept that. I cry often and I sit at night wondering what's wrong with me. I just can't take it anymore.

It's all psychological. I think you would benefit greatly from professional counseling/therapy to help you with your many issues. Strangers on an internet forum is not going to help you in any way. Your issues are way too deep and need professional help.

[annie24]

I just wish I was able to get it up with prostitutes. At least I could do that then.

 

This is not mu fault. I can accept that I am shy and I am not able to ask women out and all that. But not able to get it up with prostitutes? How is that my fault? I just can't accept that. I cry often and I sit at night wondering what's wrong with me. I just can't take it anymore.

 

Seriously, I've been with guys who have had a hard time getting it up the first few times we are together. It's nerves and anxiety. It goes away with time. I think you need to find a woman you are comfortable with, and like the other guys said, without the time constraint.

[Lorem Ipsum]

It's all psychological. I think you would benefit greatly from professional counseling/therapy to help you with your many issues. Strangers on an internet forum is not going to help you in any way. Your issues are way too deep and need professional help.

This. Given how many threads you have started that basically detail out how insecure you are about everything, you need therapy. I'm not a professional, but it seems to me that you've passed the point of "am I normal?" that most people ask themselves to pathological.

 

No one knows you are a virgin unless you tell them. You are making your whole life around this one point and making yourself completely miserable. Everyone matures at different rates, no two people have the same experience at the same time, continually comparing yourself to others as you tend to do will only deepen your unhappiness. Anyone who makes fun of you for being a virgin isn't worth your time.

[Mr_LFA]

I just wish I was able to get it up with prostitutes. At least I could do that then.

 

Maybe try having a couple of drinks before, it can help to settle your nerves.

[jul-els]

If you're a virgin, then I'm guessing it might be bothering you psychologically to be losing your virginity via this route. Your past experience with it is telling you it's not the thing for you, at least not at this point in time. My suggestion is you'd be better off not worrying too much about having sex with anyone right now. It will happen when the time is right for you.

[jenny23]

You can always try viagra ?

[bungalo]

You can always try viagra ?

You probably dont need the blue pill. I understand totally being shy with asking girls out. Do it anyway

Thats right, feel the fear and do it. Better still, get a wingman. Make the rounds at parties and

Clubs,use the winger to find out which chicks are interested. You cant get a hard on with a hooker,

Because its commercial sex man..no emotional connection. Get a real date and you will build up

The heat. If you want something closer to real scenario sex...find a massage parlor that gives happy

Endings and doesn't rush..you may have to bargain a bit...more like real life. Cheers.