attracted to someone 30 years older

[sunshines]

we are friends and got along... always a just friend thing but as of late... I really want to kiss him and I'm not a hooking up lady. .. hes substantially older...is this wrong?

 

I have that inclination because one of his daughters is about 10 years older than me and two are younger than me. I feel I never done this and my gut presses a this isn't right feeling.

[tmtex]

Just don't go there

[ParisPaulette]

How old are you? There's a huge difference between those 30 years based on where you're at age and maturity-wise--i.e. you 50 and him 80, not really an issue. You 15 and him 45--big, big issue.

[Moontiger]

Ok, before you make a move there are certain things you have to consider and accept.

 

1) Consider your ages carefully. If you are 20 that makes him 50 right now, as time pass this is what your ages will look like: 30/60 40/70 50/80 60/90/ It is likely you will end up taking care of him at the end of his life and be left a widow young if you marry him.

 

2) He isn't likely to give you children. So you have to accept that if you get involved with him.

 

3) He children are likely not going to accept you right away if at all. Sorry, but if my dad brought a chick home younger than me, I would view her with mix of pity and annoyance. To me, she would just me my dad's bimbo girlfriend and I would doubt she be around for very long.

 

If you can look at all of this and accept it, then go for it.

[Mesemene]

Is it wrong?

 

Not unless you're a minor.

 

That said - you have to look at where you and here are in life, respective to each other.

 

He's had kids, and from your tone, sounds like they're grown.

 

Are you young enough to want kids? What kind of social stuff do you like? Do you have enough in common, and few enough conflicting things, for a successful relationship?

 

You have to look at - does a relationship really have potential - or would you just be wasting time on a chemical attraction with no future, and the potential to hurt the friendship?

[Realitynut]

50 and 80 ok!!!!!???? GRAMPA!!! geeze And one in a nursing home at that!!! Ok...sure my dad died at 79, and now mom is 81 and has dementia...so um....nope.

 

20 and 50 is bad enough...as is 25 and 55...but on either end of the spectrum....GAG.....VOMIT....JUST DON'T GO THERE!

[missmarple]

You're a college student, judging from your other thread, so, I imagine, you're in your 20s and he's in his 50s. Don't do it. Nothing will come out of it and you'll lose a friend.