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I admit, I made the stupidest decision of my life, I let my emotions control me and I cheated on my boyfriend. I didn't love the other person. I didn't feel anything for them, I was drunk.

My ex left me said he didn't want to be with me and he was angry that I denied cheating on him three times before I finally came clean realizing I didn't want to live in secrets anymore and my old life in General had to end.

 

My ex says not to think he hates me or that he doesn't love me.

He said he wanted to be friends.

Then he said he needed space before talking again.

 

Throughout this time, I've been making myself happy, being around friends, understanding the relationship I had been in, what went wrong, what would I change about myself, or the relationship, if I would trust myself again or love myself? What I would like in my life.

 

He wants to meet today.

I'm nervous.

I don't know what's going to happen or what to reveal or what to wear, say, keep silent.

 

I'm freaking out.

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I admit, I made the stupidest decision of my life, I let my emotions control me and I cheated on my boyfriend. I didn't love the other person. I didn't feel anything for them, I was drunk.

I denied cheating on him three times before I finally came clean realizing I didn't want to live in secrets anymore and my old life in General had to end.

 

Throughout this time, I've been making myself happy, being around friends, understanding the relationship I had been in, what went wrong, what would I change about myself, or the relationship, if I would trust myself again or love myself? What I would like in my life.

 

what to reveal or what to wear.

 

Sounds to me that you need more time to grow up. Being drunk is never an acceptable excuse for cheating. Saying that you let your emotions control you and then that you did not feel anything for the person you cheated with sounds very contradicting. You were not happy with your relationship and you need to be clear about the real reasons you did what you did. Sounds like you are not in touch with your inner self. Lying like that was a major form of betrayal and you probably came clean because you were afraid that you would eventually be caught rather than realizing that you didn't want to live in secrets. Nowhere in this post do you own up to the fact that what you did was very hurtful. It is all about you, you, you. What to wear should be the least of your worries...You need to be clear on why you felt the need to cheat and lie or you are liable to get yourself into trouble again.

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