Hoping I made the correct decision

[Bergk]

I have been thrown off balance this past week.

Against my own instincts, I persevered dating somebody that I had continuous doubts about – but I finally managed to express that it wasn't working between us.

 

She consistently swayed from showing interest and reaching out, to barely reciprocating and being disrespectful and rude. It was not a phase, more a weekly rotation of opposite emotions. I spoke to close friends and they warned me to be very cautious.

I understand that men are expected to take the lead. I considered she may have wanted me to show more desire - but she was habitually leaving me hanging on agreed arrangements (I had been stood up earlier), ignoring important texts and generally being inconsiderate and selfish.

 

I had even asked her several times over these two months if she had any doubts; and that I'd understand and be willing to discuss anything that was on her mind – but she would deny and explain that she was bewildered that I had these thoughts. She reassured me, a matter of days ago that she was still interested – but nothing improved and my patience ran out.

 

I was unequivocally messed around. I'm sad because she was never vocal. I treated her well and was thoughtful to other things that may be going on in her life that I wasn't aware of - but I rarely felt we were on the same wavelength, despite having great chemistry when we eventually spent time together.

 

I don't think Valentine's Day helped, at all. I believe she had issues that she didn't want to express to me.

 

I'm also sad because I would have really welcomed us being good friends – but once she became cold I had no other option but to explain we needed to part ways. Unsurprisingly, she did not acknowledge the message.

 

It's hard to know what to take from this experience.

 

Thanks for reading.

[ChellyV]

Oh. I wish I have men like you around.

 

I would say she isn't interested. Being stood up is a big no-no. This causes me to think, if someone really wants you, you don't want to start off like this right.

You made the right decision. I would say move along. Respect in a relationship is of utmost importance really.

[chr8st8na]

if this is the same girl that disappeared on you... then yea, learn from it. dont waste time on hot&cold ppl- usually they are too afraid or screwy in the head.

[goodheartlady]

Hey happy valentines. Live and learn. I am glad you now see the red flags - albeit in retrospect. Take these observations into your next relationship. Best of luck!

[missmarple]

It's hard to know what to take from this experience.

 

If in doubt, end things. When something feels wrong, it usually is. That's what you should take from this experience

[patterned]

You set standards for how people that are in your life are allowed to treat you. See the actions. If they don't measure up you cut that person out. They either step up or don't, either way you're doing well.