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Do dumpers ever apologize for their actions towards the dumpee


blackmilk

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Do dumpers ever apologize for how they treated you? In my case, my ex lied to me about emotionally cheating on me for a few months. Funny, they started doing the nasty a week after my relationship with her ended, and yet, I am the bad guy for everything I have done. All the blame is pointed to me. I really want an apology from ym ex, but I don't think I will ever get one. So, like the question asks: do dumpers ever apologize for their actions towards the dumpee?

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Sounds a lot like my situation. Except in my case they were dating within a week.

In their mind they were doing the right thing by 'not hurting you via withholding that information from you'. So I doubt that they will apologize.

 

They're stupid and they think they have done the right thing. Nothing you say will change their mind. Just try to let it go. It's hard.

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It depends on the ex and who they are as a person. Some people cheat easily because they really don't have a conscience and it is that same lack of conscience that will bring about it a lack of an apology.

 

Others fall into emotional situations that they hadn't planned or expected … and whilst that doesn't make it any more justifiable they will, at least, be full of guilt and empathy for the pain they are going to cause/are causing and you will likely get an apology. Ultimately it makes them feel better so I don't know if, in that sense, it really helps getting one.

 

I personally don't think it matters if you get an apology or not … not in the long run anyway. I know, at this moment in time, it matters to you or feels as if it does because you are still hurting and you so desperately want to stop hurting. However apologies don't actually give you the closure you think they will or ease the pain you still feel.

 

Sometimes NOT getting an apology, and thus being able to see your ex as the selfish person they are really are, helps you move on easier.

 

However, whether you get an apology or not, you still need to find closure within yourself.

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Do dumpers ever apologize for how they treated you? In my case, my ex lied to me about emotionally cheating on me for a few months. Funny, they started doing the nasty a week after my relationship with her ended, and yet, I am the bad guy for everything I have done. All the blame is pointed to me. I really want an apology from ym ex, but I don't think I will ever get one. So, like the question asks: do dumpers ever apologize for their actions towards the dumpee?

 

Some do, some don't. The thing is that an apology doesn't change what happened so it makes no real difference for your life at the end of the day. I got one and I am here to tell you that even if you get an apology, it won't stop you from hurting. It doesn't change what happened. It is up to you to free yourself of the hurt once you are ready to move on. Good luck with your healing.

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If they are too apologize it usually will be months or years after the fact. If they cheated, they are in no state of mind to even understand they need to apologize. However, if down the road they grow a conscious and work on themselves, they may come to realize what they have done and look you up and apologize. Don't hold your breath waiting.

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My ex-wife has apologized a few times. Yesterday she gave me a Valentine's card and was crying, saying how sorry she was for everything.

 

To be honest, it didn't change my feelings towards her as far as ever wanting her back, but I'm happy that we remain great friends.

 

I think I've reached a point we're I'm happy where I am, and really once you reach that point an apology isn't needed.

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I did... Years later. I was 16 at the time. I broke up with me 2nd GF because we were fighting too much. She asked for support, for me to be there for her at least as a friend. I dissapeared from her life... Two weeks later a mutual friend told me she tried to kill herself. And yet I did not reach to her. I never thought a breakup could screw you so much emotionally. I had no idea at the time.

 

7 years later I get dumped via facebook, all our mutual friends take her side (my current ex) and I get abandoned by pretty much everyone I knew. She was rude, cold and distant towards me. So it hit me. I done a similar thing in the past. I hurt someone really, really bad and didn't even realize. So I reached to her. I apologized for everything I done to her. The way I did things. The way I broke up with her. It was unfair. I was a kid but still it's no excuse...

 

She thanked me from the bottom of her heart. She said it lifted a weight from her shoulder. We talk here and there but nothing on a daily basis.

 

Sometimes the dumper do apoligize.

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