kalyanna Posted February 10, 2014 Author Share Posted February 10, 2014 Well, if he works 2 jobs, it makes more sense that he could be too busy. What was the frequency of the first 3 dates? I mean, was it like a date a week? We went out on January 24, 28 and 31st Link to comment
missmarple Posted February 10, 2014 Share Posted February 10, 2014 We went out on January 24, 28 and 31st Either work got too busy after your last date or, as I said before, he's full of it. Yeah, I return to my previous comment...give him the benefit of the doubt this week, too...but if there's no date, move on. Link to comment
kalyanna Posted February 10, 2014 Author Share Posted February 10, 2014 Either work got too busy after your last date or, as I said before, he's full of it. Yeah, I return to my previous comment...give him the benefit of the doubt this week, too...but if there's no date, move on. I will do that. Thank you. Especially since it is valentine's day on Friday. Link to comment
savignon Posted February 10, 2014 Share Posted February 10, 2014 Either work got too busy after your last date or, as I said before, he's full of it. Yeah, I return to my previous comment...give him the benefit of the doubt this week, too...but if there's no date, move on. I agree with this. There's regular busy and then there's "I don't have a free minute for 2 weeks"??? Especially if he asked to be exclusive I'd expect he'd want to actually see you. Doesn't quite add up in my books. I'd give him till Wed or Thurs to make plans for this weekend and then reassess if the "relationship" was working for me. Texting is eaaaasssssy. It occupies down time and keeps you entertained. The real work is in actually setting up dates and locking down that time with someone. Link to comment
kalyanna Posted February 10, 2014 Author Share Posted February 10, 2014 I agree with this. There's regular busy and then there's "I don't have a free minute for 2 weeks"??? Especially if he asked to be exclusive I'd expect he'd want to actually see you. Doesn't quite add up in my books. I'd give him till Wed or Thurs to make plans for this weekend and then reassess if the "relationship" was working for me. Texting is eaaaasssssy. It occupies down time and keeps you entertained. The real work is in actually setting up dates and locking down that time with someone. That's my feeling exactly. I don't want a pen pal. LOL Link to comment
Realitynut Posted February 10, 2014 Share Posted February 10, 2014 He sounds like a great guy! Very busy with 2 jobs, and takes time out to do family functions. If you guys had dated longer, he would probably be asking you to join him. But since you are new.....it would look weird to take a girl that no one has even heard of. I'm older, and i ONLY date one person at a time...especially after 3 dates. lol. But that has only happened once in 3 years! lol Anyway, Us older folks can't muddy up our lives by juggling multiple people, especially if we care for one more than the others. He is old enough that he is wanting to become exclusive....form a relationship....and probably get married. Don't screw it up by being too pushy and 'why aren't you seeing me' persona. Since he was busy this past weekend...10 days isn't so long. And to send you a book that you were interested in??? That takes a LOT of TIME and EFFORT! Just be there, be friendly, and say...'hey....what are we doing for Valentine's Day?" Or since you're exclusive, just call the poor guy and say, "since you've been so busy lately, i thought I'd make you a home cooked meal....burgers sound good??" Geez take the bull by the horns, be nice and sweet....not demanding that he drops everything to cater to you! He wasn't sounding like he was hiding anything...he told you every day what he was doing. Actually, he sounds pretty perfect to me. (my sis and her husband met online....took down their profiles immediately....when you know...you just know! No need to look around at others...) Link to comment
Realitynut Posted February 10, 2014 Share Posted February 10, 2014 asked me which days I would be free this week but didn't pin down a date. Did you tell him what days? Call or txt him back and say...'hey, i was free this wed. night...was that a good day for you? Come eat dinner with me and we can discuss "valentine's day".....lol Everything is so damn easy...and we try to make it sooooo damnnnnn hard! Link to comment
kalyanna Posted February 10, 2014 Author Share Posted February 10, 2014 Did you tell him what days? Call or txt him back and say...'hey, i was free this wed. night...was that a good day for you? Come eat dinner with me and we can discuss "valentine's day".....lol Everything is so damn easy...and we try to make it sooooo damnnnnn hard! He asked me what days I was available this week and I told him but he still didn't set a date but I will invite him over for a meal. I like your advice. Link to comment
Realitynut Posted February 10, 2014 Share Posted February 10, 2014 Thanks! Hope all goes well this week! It's hard to find a nice guy that is hard working and you have chemistry. PLUS, he doesn't want to "date around"....Congrats! Link to comment
Batya33 Posted February 11, 2014 Share Posted February 11, 2014 "I'm older, and i ONLY date one person at a time...especially after 3 dates. lol. But that has only happened once in 3 years! lol Anyway, Us older folks can't muddy up our lives by juggling multiple people, especially if we care for one more than the others. He is old enough that he is wanting to become exclusive....form a relationship....and probably get married." I think it's unwise to close off options after only 3 dates especially if the person is older and wants marriage in the not too distant future. It's hard to meet quality people who are compatible and to put all your eggs in one basket after 3 dates means you're giving up opportunities to meet people who might be right for you. So, OP, if he is dating other women right now I think that's perfectly fine and it means he's being smart about his love life. If after 2-3 months of dating he's not getting together with you regularly and he's still dating other people that might be a different story. It's also different if sex is involved. Sleeping around is not the same as dating around. I would not be married now if I had committed to someone after only a few dates- I had been on 3 or 4 dates with someone when I reconnected with my ex -now my husband. I continued to see the other guy and once things got serious with my "ex" I broke it off with the other guy. I told the other guy I didn't want to decide on being exclusive until we'd been dating closer to 2 months. It wasn't because of my ex it was because of my not wanting to forego other options -at almost 39 I was running out of time to meet "the one". I hope you have a great time with him and I'd take it one date at a time for now. Link to comment
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