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The title says it all. Friday night, and I'm alone watching tv. No one I feel I can contact, again. Thinking of my ex, with the person he left me for. Getting on with his life, happy, positive about the future. Of course I don't know if that's true, but that's where my mind's going. My dad is also seriously ill. And I feel so alone.

 

Also have an inappropriate crush on a long-standing colleague who's recently separated, just to confuse things. I've always liked him a bit. But never thought of him as available, thought his marriage was rock solid. Never considered it. I don't know if I even really like him. Maybe it's just the loneliness, and masking the pain of rejection. Of course I'm not going there in reality, with everything I'm not in a good, healthy place at all. But there it is. I'm stuck in a dark place.

 

Can anyone relate or offer any perspective?

 

Thanks.

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Pebbles I can relate, I'm there in your exact mind frame right now. In bed, lonely, imagining him out with friends or new gf having a great time. I know everyone says it doesn't matter what they are doing but I think an idol mind will always go there. I think it's important to Feel like this though, to go through that feeling that they're really happy when you're miserable. I know my ex is very busy with work and always surrounded by people as he's in the military but I also know what goes up must come down and although we feel sad now in time we will have heeled and no longer care and they will experience that down. But by then we won't care if they're up or down!

 

Just know you're not alone in the way to you feel and it's temporary... In my view the best thing about being the dumped/wronged person is you start off so low you have much further to climb but the hard climb makes the view that much more beautiful when you reach the top. Remember that when you think of them.

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Just imagine him unhappy if it helps you move on. Actually, what does help is just moving on yourself and not giving a **** what he's doing but it's verrrry hard to make yourself believe this for long periods of time find.

 

But don't think about him being happy and stuff. That will not do you any good. That is beating yourself up infact. He's a looser and he's going to be unhappy, maybe not today or tomorrow but he will. You don't want that looser in your life. He=unhappiness. Believe!

 

Just keep pushing along and do things for you to benefit your life etc. I know it's valentines soon and that is just pissing me right off I can tell you. But I'm gonna go out on the day and have a nice time no matter what. It can be hard to find things to do, people to call places to go but I have gone places on my own and been ok. Scared at first! But also there have been plenty times where I have just had to accept I have no one to talk to and no where to go and that is really upsetting after being with someone and us always planning our lives together...it sucks.

 

But it will be worth it in the long run you know? You don'd need that ex and you don't need this newly single guy. He is not ready for this and neither are you probably. Get involved in things/with people who build YOU up. Not that you have to look after. No more of that.

 

You just have to find things to do to fill the void I reckon. And who knows you might find something really good and have a much happier life because of it. Find those things. Pursue dreams and desires. And you can do this without ex poo face. You might not have been able to with him. Now you can! Woo!

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You're not alone! You have hundreds of people on here and millions of people in the world going through heart break. It doesn't completely take the pain away but at least it may help you realize it's not your own struggle...so many people are dealing with the same things...maybe visiting your father will help you (and your father)

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