simplyxpinaii Posted February 3, 2014 Share Posted February 3, 2014 For the longest time, I've had trouble forming opinions. For example, if someone were to ask me if I like a movie or if I went shopping with a family member and they asked if I liked a piece of clothing, most of the time (but not all the time), I'd respond with "I don't know". However, it is usually because I honestly don't know or because it takes me long to put my words together. If I were to say this in person, I wouldn't be able to because you'd probably hear lots of stumbling from me. I went with family to watch the movie called Frozen and I had opinions about it while thinking to myself but when my aunt asked if I liked it, its like I forgot everything. Even now, I'm still questioning if I liked the movie. Usually, if people are asked if they like a movie, they have some comment afterwards whereas if someone asked me if I like a movie, I can't think of anything to say. I mean, why can't I form opinions? Is there something wrong with me? I am pretty sure I am still the same person I was when I was 14. I am 22 years old now. I still look for approval from my parents. Link to comment
Circe Posted February 3, 2014 Share Posted February 3, 2014 Hi, Regardless of whether you have a disorder of some kind - if you have an issue which you feel is causing you trouble in life, it's well worth looking into it and working on it. I'm wondering though - is your problem really with forming opinions? You say you had lots of thoughts about the movie while you were watching it. Can you remember what those thoughts were? Can you type them out? Are those thoughts opinions? Can you form judgments? You probably do this on some scale every day or you wouldn't be able to function. Opinions aren't very different to judgments. Do you think your issue might be with anxiety? Do you get scared and anxious when people ask you to share an opinion? Link to comment
simplyxpinaii Posted February 3, 2014 Author Share Posted February 3, 2014 Actually, no, I do not remember what I was thinking about the movie as I was watching it. Even now, when I ask myself if I like the movie or what I liked about it, I tell myself that I don't know. I mean, I guess I can say I like the movie but I wouldn't really be able to tell why I liked it. I don't get scared when asked to share an opinion, it is more like I forget what I should say or words are mixed up. Link to comment
pippy longstocking Posted February 3, 2014 Share Posted February 3, 2014 . I still look for approval from my parents. this is very telling ...is it that your parents have dominated your decisions or knocked you down when you make decisions ...has your confidence been knocked enough that it has left you unable to feel secure in passing any opinion about anything ? Link to comment
simplyxpinaii Posted February 3, 2014 Author Share Posted February 3, 2014 Actually, no, I do not remember what I was thinking about the movie as I was watching it. Even now, when I ask myself if I like the movie or what I liked about it, I tell myself that I don't know. I mean, I guess I can say I like the movie but I wouldn't really be able to tell why I liked it. I don't get scared when asked to share an opinion, it is more like I forget what I should say or words are mixed up. Hi, Regardless of whether you have a disorder of some kind - if you have an issue which you feel is causing you trouble in life, it's well worth looking into it and working on it. I'm wondering though - is your problem really with forming opinions? You say you had lots of thoughts about the movie while you were watching it. Can you remember what those thoughts were? Can you type them out? Are those thoughts opinions? Can you form judgments? You probably do this on some scale every day or you wouldn't be able to function. Opinions aren't very different to judgments. Do you think your issue might be with anxiety? Do you get scared and anxious when people ask you to share an opinion? Link to comment
simplyxpinaii Posted February 3, 2014 Author Share Posted February 3, 2014 this is very telling ...is it that your parents have dominated your decisions or knocked you down when you make decisions ...has your confidence been knocked enough that it has left you unable to feel secure in passing any opinion about anything ? I don't remember how I was raised before I turned 14. All I know about when I was younger, I've always craved attention from school mates. I'd brag about things. However, when I got older, I became distant with people. During junior high and first year of high school, I'd purposely ignore people and wonder why I didn't have friends. I'd also skip a lot of public speaking. I have no clue if this has anything to do with my not being able to form opinions though. Link to comment
Circe Posted February 3, 2014 Share Posted February 3, 2014 Did something significant happen to you around the age of 13/14? Link to comment
Capricorn3 Posted February 3, 2014 Share Posted February 3, 2014 I don't remember how I was raised before I turned 14. How can you not know how you were raised? Link to comment
Circe Posted February 3, 2014 Share Posted February 3, 2014 Do you remember anything at all about what happened before you were 14? Link to comment
Circe Posted February 3, 2014 Share Posted February 3, 2014 Simplyxpinaii, I did a very small amount of research on the psych literature that I have access to but nothing really obvious popped up. I think you do have a problem of some nature - it might be psychological but it might be physical. The frontal lobe is responsible for opinion formation. Could you have been in some kind of accident that could have caused some damage to that region when you were 13/14? You might want to ask your parents if you don't remember... It might be worth talking to your GP about it and see if you can get a referral. If you really want to get to the bottom of this - I suggest trying to get a referral to a neuro specialist (a medical doctor) and a psych as well.. you don't have to take anyone's word as gospel on what you hear - get second opinions etc - but they might be able to give you some ideas as to what is up. Link to comment
Snny Posted February 3, 2014 Share Posted February 3, 2014 I am doing research with children who have autism and learning disabilities. I have also worked with children who had emotional disabilities for over two years. Not being able to form a cognitive opinion in low tiered questions or being having limited memories doesn't sound like a symptom that would match with the disability I have experience with. It seems like there is some damage to your brain, but I'm not a trained doctor with MRI/CAT equipment to definitely say it is. For medical questions such as these, you need to speak with a doctor. Nobody should diagnose you just by analyzing a certain behavior (in fact 80% of individuals with "autism" have been misdiagnosed by observations of behavior and instead have brain seizures that are easily treatable). This is an amateur advice board that would not be qualified to answer these type of questions. Link to comment
simplyxpinaii Posted February 3, 2014 Author Share Posted February 3, 2014 I just don't know how to choose a medical doctor or a therapist. I usually use Google for information but because this is concerning my health, then I am not sure. Link to comment
Capricorn3 Posted February 4, 2014 Share Posted February 4, 2014 How can you not know how you were raised? OP: Can you clarify this please? It will help us understand what's going on. Link to comment
Circe Posted February 4, 2014 Share Posted February 4, 2014 Go to your local GP and explain the problem. Then go to another and get a second opinion. Doing that is better than doing nothing.. Sent from my iPad using Tapatalk Link to comment
simplyxpinaii Posted February 4, 2014 Author Share Posted February 4, 2014 Go to your local GP and explain the problem. Then go to another and get a second opinion. Doing that is better than doing nothing.. Sent from my iPad using Tapatalk What is a GP? Sorry, I am not good with abbreviations. Link to comment
simplyxpinaii Posted February 4, 2014 Author Share Posted February 4, 2014 OP: Can you clarify this please? It will help us understand what's going on. How do I explain how I was raised? All I know is that, I wasn't like this when I was younger. Apparently, when I was much younger, I was a lot more talkative and social but as I got older, I became more reserved. Then again, this is according to my parents. What I remember about when I was younger is that I never had much of a social life. First off, I don't live with my biological parents. I was raised by my mother's uncle and his wife but I call them my parents. The story is that I was given to my aunt and uncle when I was 3 months old. I know my biological parents and I know my 6 younger siblings. Anyways, I didn't have much of a social life compared to others my age. I was always shy and quiet despite craving attention. When I was 14, I moved to the Philippines and suddenly gained friends but when I finally found a boyfriend, my parents went crazy and decided that I was only able to be with who they thought were better company. If I were with my own chosen friends, there would always be someone spying on me. I don't know. Might that be something that could have affected my growth? There's also the fact that whenever I talk, I always feel I'm not talking in a way that people would understand. I mean, most of the time, if I try to explain something to myself out loud, words end up all jumbled up. I sometimes think that I don't even know English. Ugh. Hope you understand what I'm trying to say. Link to comment
Capricorn3 Posted February 4, 2014 Share Posted February 4, 2014 What is a GP? Sorry, I am not good with abbreviations. A GP is a General Practitioner - in other words, a doctor - usually the local/family doctor. Link to comment
simplyxpinaii Posted February 4, 2014 Author Share Posted February 4, 2014 I think the reason that when people ask me something as simple as,"Do you like this movie?" is because when I think about it, my words just seems all jumbled up. Link to comment
mhowe Posted February 4, 2014 Share Posted February 4, 2014 Don't worry about the words. From your posts it seems like you generally don't even form a thought or opinion. You really need to research this. You should be able to say: 1. I liked it because.... 2. I did not like it because.... Not...."I don't know." Link to comment
simplyxpinaii Posted February 4, 2014 Author Share Posted February 4, 2014 Don't worry about the words. From your posts it seems like you generally don't even form a thought or opinion. You really need to research this. You should be able to say: 1. I liked it because.... 2. I did not like it because.... Not...."I don't know." I don't for a thought or opinion? Really? I know I like watching Disney because its more simple for me to understand. Maybe I am stupid? Most people have more than one thing to say about something if they actually do like something. Have you watched the movie Frozen? Let's see. If I really think about it. I'd say I like it because I like the songs. I liked the effects. I also like that unlike the movie being about a princess falling in love with a prince, the movie is about the love between sisters. Then again, this was not what I was thinking at the time. And honestly, I feel that this coming from my mouth, seems awkward. Link to comment
mhowe Posted February 4, 2014 Share Posted February 4, 2014 That was very good! And you eben looked behind the obvious! I think what it is all about is you are afraid to "own" your voice because your parents may have been very controlling. So practice...when someone asks your opinion...say what you feel. Don't over think it!! Link to comment
simplyxpinaii Posted February 4, 2014 Author Share Posted February 4, 2014 That was very good! And you eben looked behind the obvious! I think what it is all about is you are afraid to "own" your voice because your parents may have been very controlling. So practice...when someone asks your opinion...say what you feel. Don't over think it!! Then again, I am typing all this and usually people think before they type. I personally think I am a way better typer/writer than a speaker. Link to comment
mhowe Posted February 4, 2014 Share Posted February 4, 2014 It takes practice. You do know what you think...you just seem to be afraid to voice it. Because in order to even have the thought...you have to take it in and digest it. Just like the movie....not about the prince/princess...about the sisters. Think it...say it and be proud of it. It doesn't matter if anyone agrees with you. That is why it is called an opinion. Link to comment
Circe Posted February 4, 2014 Share Posted February 4, 2014 I understand what you are saying. You should definitely get it checked out - a GP is the doctor you would go to if you had a cold. He will refer you to the right specialists Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk Link to comment
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