To what extent must I tolerate a loopy acquaintance?

[sammi87]

A few months ago, I ended up with a pet that I thought needed a companion. We contacted a local rescue and they matched us with a woman who wanted to give up her pet. We met up at the shelter so she could get to know us a bit and see if our pets got along. One of the questions she asked was if we took her pet, could she could on occasion stop by for 5-10 mins to visit. At the time I said yes. At the end of the meet & greet she said she still wasn't ready to let go and would like to visit our home before making a decision. We said sure.

 

When that day came, she was 30 mins late and to say she over stayed her welcome (by hrs) would be putting it mildly... She also ended up sitting on our floor crying about her ex boyfriend. We put up with it because we knew that she was not providing a good home for the animal and we wanted to take him in. Finally, we got her out the door. I checked in with her the next day and the following week just to let her know things were going well and I even sent her pictures of her former pet showing how comfy he was.

 

Just 3 wks after dropping him off...she called and asked if she could come out and visit him. My husband and I (dreading another 3 hr, tearful visit) made an excuse and said no. However, this woman is calling every two weeks asking to see the pets. Frankly, she does not know how to handle these animals, she gets overly personal and stays too long for us to EVER want to have her over to our home again. She is not taking the hint.

 

Am I obligated to allow her a least a couple visits since I once said I would? Or can I just say that upon further thought, I don't think it would be best for the pet as I don't want to do anything to disrupt his adjustment?

[mhowe]

You do not need to let her see them. She is clearly disturbed and has boundary issues.

[Batya33]

Just a thought -can you meet at a dog park or somewhere else where there are other people and she's not as comfy /can't hang out as long?

[pippy longstocking]

Just a thought -can you meet at a dog park or somewhere else where there are other people and she's not as comfy /can't hang out as long?

 

I like this idea ^^^^

 

she sounds very lonely ...nto that that is your problem,...it isn't ...but you said she could visit him so you must at least try to honour that a little .

[sammi87]

Just a thought -can you meet at a dog park or somewhere else where there are other people and she's not as comfy /can't hang out as long?

 

They are piggies. Big ones that don't like car rides

[sammi87]

Thanks all! I agree with mhowe. I did say she could visit, but there is an implied social contract that dictates how you should behave as a guest in someone's home. I feel comfortable now deciding that since did not behave appropriately, she will not be invited back.