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My partner and I have just ended a long distance 7 year relationship. We live 2.5 hours drive apart. We each have 2 kids and both have stressful jobs. She told me that she needed a break and was unhappy. Neither of us have really been putting 100% into the relationship for about the past year, plus I have been in the middle of a major house renovation which hasn't helped. It was basically just little things like putting off our weekends together because neither of us "had time". Since splitting I have sent her (one) polite text message taking responsibility for not making a great effort recently & apologising and she sent me one back saying pretty much the same. She thanked me for sending her the message. I did not mention getting back together as we both need time apart and it is far too soon after only two weeks. I have avoided any contact since.

 

She knows I am sorry about what happened so I think I should leave it at that - at least for now. My general feeling is that it could take many months to reconcile - if at all. She will be in touch at some stage as we have some shared financial interests. Although we were long distance we were very compatible and had many great times together, it's just that we both probably stopped working on the relationship (or at least didn't work hard enough). Even our children get along pretty well. I am planning to do a bit of investing in myself (eg fitness) in the meantime plus finish the house. The stupid thing is I could see this coming yet didn't start putting some effort into the relationship 6 months ago. Yet on the other hand perhaps we DID both need a break from each other. I must be sounding very confused.

 

My biggest concern would be getting back together and then having the same issues re-surface again. Then again it is difficult to say goodbye to 7 wonderful years with the same partner. I'm surprised that 2 well educated people with good communication skills could have let things slide so much - especially myself. Advice needed - thanks...

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