Circe Posted February 15, 2014 Author Share Posted February 15, 2014 Yup - I certainly did - so embarrassing!! Ok so today I met up with my friend - friends since we were 11 and at one stage very close. Lost that closeness for a while because she irritated me too much - but regained it recently cause she went through such a hard time with a marriage break down. She has a 3yr old recently diagnosed as being high functioning aspergers. Normally we meet by ourselves for a drink but today we had coffee and her daughter was there. I absolutely loved this little girl as she too (like our cousins daughter ) is very affectionate - and kids that age are so incredibly soft and fun to cuddle and put up on your lap. When I left she ran behind me and hugged my leg and said that I couldn't go - which totally melted my heart. The thing is .. I dunno. I can't say it without sounding critical and I don't want to be critical because my friend is now a single mum going through a really hard time.. But this is a journal after all so I'll just say it. These things bugged me: 1) my friend spelled the word autistic rather than saying it out loud as she didn't want her daughter to feel labelled BUT she spent several minutes talking about various fathers who murdered their little kids before killing themselves - and how worried she was her own husband might have done this (he's now in another country - left recently) in front of her!! I was like- wth?? I was a bit shocked she'd say this in front of the girl and so changed the topic. 2) while telling me how incredibly hard it is to raise kids she told me she felt guilty because one day her daughter jumped on her tummy while she was lying in bed because she was excited to see her mum and my friend was so angry her daughter hurt her that she picked her daughter up and threw her in anger (I imagine she landed on the bed unharmed but still -I ..urgh 3) her daughter is really adorable - which, I know, is easy for me to say - but my friend often has such a negative way of dealing with her. It was an issue in their fight for custody. The father said my friend was too combatant and harsh with the daughter. My friend said the dad erred too far in the opposite direction and spoiled her and made her behaviour worse. I dunno - I know my friend and I know she has a loving heart - but .. Urgh I hate writing this because I don't feel right judging a friend who is going through so tough a time. But the honest to god journal truth is that I feel sorry for her daughter and think my friend should try a bit harder. I feel carp saying that because my friend is already so exhausted and I personally have no clue how hard it must be. I dunno - I just didn't like it. Sent from my iPad using Tapatalk Link to comment
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