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Thinking about Trying Online Dating Again

Bigdave117

By Bigdave117
in Dating Advice

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Bigdave117 Apprentice

Bigdave117

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so this Asian woman who was going crazy for me when I sold her a car a few weeks back just texted me. Should I go out on a date with her? She didn't look that great when I first saw her but it didn't seem like she even tried. She is 40 years old...been in the states for 10 years or so

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Thorshammer Contributor

Thorshammer

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so this Asian woman who was going crazy for me when I sold her a car a few weeks back just texted me. Should I go out on a date with her? She didn't look that great when I first saw her but it didn't seem like she even tried. She is 40 years old...been in the states for 10 years or so

 

Asian and 10 years in the states... uh oh... Just kidding

 

Ya, go for it. Maybe she looks good on date-mode.

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Bigdave117 Apprentice

Bigdave117

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Uhhh..wait you're a 25-year-old guy who is looking for a GF. Why would you want to date a 40-year-old woman who "didn't look that great" in your eyes?

 

And maybe she just wants a discount haha.

 

 

She already bought the car, how could she want a discount at this point?

 

 

She was the one who said I look better than Mario Lopez in real life

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John John Proficient

John John

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that was my age range that I put in on link removed

 

 

but 15 years is not a huge difference. One of my best friends is 14 years older than me

 

I always think about long term potential. I've hooked up with a few cougars this year. But I want to be a father some day...so I always keep that in mind too.

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lostandhurt Grand Master

lostandhurt

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Yes paid sites are better because it reduces the number of men. Free sites are great for practice and figuring out what work and what doesn't but if you are serious you have to pay. Think of it this way, How much do you spend at a club hoping to meet a girl? Pay sites are cheap compared to everything else.

 

Pictures are the most important thing. I don't care how good you can write, if you don't have a good picture they will not even bother to read what you wrote. Get your friend or brother/sister to take some good pictures of you and then ask the women in your life (coworkers, friends) to pick out the best ones for you. Google how to take a great picture and follow the advice. The setting sun is awesome for great lighting so keep that in mind. No dead animals, guns, gang signs, shirtless pics, or anything else that makes you look like anything other than what you are. Once again women can help you with this.

 

There are several great posts on here on making a good profile. I can send you some info in a PM if you like. I had great success with online dating and actually had women messaging me.

 

Let me know if you want that info.

 

Lost

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NorthDallas40 Grand Master

NorthDallas40

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OP - I think I've found your real problem. In the past few months you've received....

 

7 pages of advice here:

 

 

4 pages of advice here:

 

 

2 pages of advice here:

 

 

10 pages of advice here:

 

 

Now 12 pages (and counting) on this current thread, all basically about the same topic:

"How can I get a date?"

 

But judging from your responses, I doubt you've done a single thing anyone's recommended.

 

So how about this:

 

GET OFF ENA, GET BACK INTO REAL LIFE, AND PUT IN THE WORK TO FIND, ATTRACT, AND DATE A GIRL!

 

And don't begin another thread until you've gone on a date.

 

I think it would do wonders for your love life.

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LoveSoDeep Experienced

LoveSoDeep

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that was my age range that I put in on link removed

 

 

but 15 years is not a huge difference. One of my best friends is 14 years older than me

 

Yeah....even I don't entertain a real relationship with someone that far from my own age. Once you get outside of 10 years or so it's just really difficult... Unless you really don't want to have kids of your own...then by all means it could work for you. If kids and family are something you want....since you are 25 I'd say 14 years (that would make the woman 39) is stretching it. If you don't want kids and genuinely click with older women then I say go with it.

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John John Proficient

John John

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I just got a wink from a 28 year old smoking hot elementary school teacher. She hasn't read my message yet...but I kept it short and sweet.

 

I say this to show that yes...with a carefully crafted profile, you too can have hot girls (occasionally) wink at/email you. And I'm also a bit on the short side (unlike you, OP). While that's a no-no for guys and online dating, I still do pretty ok. Fix up your profile, and with your stats, you should be golden man.

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Bigdave117 Apprentice

Bigdave117

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Yeah....even I don't entertain a real relationship with someone that far from my own age. Once you get outside of 10 years or so it's just really difficult... Unless you really don't want to have kids of your own...then by all means it could work for you. If kids and family are something you want....since you are 25 I'd say 14 years (that would make the woman 39) is stretching it. If you don't want kids and genuinely click with older women then I say go with it.

 

 

It wouldn't be marriage, more of a fun semi casual kinda thing. When it comes time to marriage, I will likely marry someone +/-5 years

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Bigdave117 Apprentice

Bigdave117

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OP - I think I've found your real problem. In the past few months you've received....

 

 

This is what I've been told is the key to getting a girl

 

 

Improve myself - I do this obsessively in every category, everyday

Have goals/ambition - I am almost 25 and I'm going to start investing so I can retire and live in Hawaii rest of my life when I'm 50

Have a social life - I go out 2-3 times a week and constantly meet new people. Most people who know me like me quite a bit because I'm genuine and respectful in real life

Talk to everybody - I am in sales and socialize for a living

 

 

I don't know what else I can do. Despite all my efforts, I don't meet women AT ALL in my day to day life. I've got some female friends - there's a female coworker at my job who is gorgeous and VERY nice who I get along great with but absolutely nothing going on in terms of a dating life

 

 

At this point, my only choice seems to be either cold approaching or online dating. Both categories are much criticized by many people as being a horrendous medium for dating for men but I don't know what else I can do

 

 

I would love to "get a date" as you're talking about but it's easier said than done

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Bigdave117 Apprentice

Bigdave117

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I just got a wink from a 28 year old smoking hot elementary school teacher. She hasn't read my message yet...but I kept it short and sweet.

 

I say this to show that yes...with a carefully crafted profile, you too can have hot girls (occasionally) wink at/email you. And I'm also a bit on the short side (unlike you, OP). While that's a no-no for guys and online dating, I still do pretty ok. Fix up your profile, and with your stats, you should be golden man.

 

 

Any tips on having a good profile?

 

 

Like I said, I suck at being an entertaining/funny writer (which is strange because I was a very good writer in school but it just doesn't translate when I'm talking about myself). Also any tips on writing interesting messages? I can't do funny messages either

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Realitynut Mentor

Realitynut

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You said you like to go out and drink/party. At your age, i think a lot of 25-30 yr. olds are still out there 'shaking it'.....lol

 

So what's wrong with the clubs in your area???? You're just outside of Chicago for god's sake...PRIME!

 

I've always gone out dancing/bars until i got married at 32....doesn't mean that i especially liked it. But until you're in your 30's, i think the clubs are still an ok place to go to meet people!

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Bigdave117 Apprentice

Bigdave117

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You said you like to go out and drink/party. At your age, i think a lot of 25-30 yr. olds are still out there 'shaking it'.....lol

 

So what's wrong with the clubs in your area???? You're just outside of Chicago for god's sake...PRIME!

 

I've always gone out dancing/bars until i got married at 32....doesn't mean that i especially liked it. But until you're in your 30's, i think the clubs are still an ok place to go to meet people!

 

 

I go out all the time but I don't meet women at all in my day to day routine - IE the various social groups that I hang out with and the people they know. The only way for me to get a date is to cold approach somebody there and that is so difficult for so many reasons. All the girls go out with their own big social groups. You have to not only approach 1 stranger, but likely engage their entire group to get anywhere. The girls are defensive to begin with and are pretty much coming there knowing that they're going to have to turn down 50 guys that night. And I'm not even one of those lame guys who just goes to clubs only the intention of meeting women. I love dancing and I love trance/techno but the idea that it's easy to meet a girl at one of these joints is absolutely absurd

 

 

As far as this area being prime, I think it's prime if you're either a woman or a man who is very good looking/has great game who also meets a lot of women in his day to day to life (social circle, work, school, etc...). For us guys who are not in that group, it is very difficult

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