Making the decision to move for a LDR..and other questions..

[JA0371]

If you're in or have been in a LDR, at what point did you decide a move needed to happen for one or both parties?

 

Is there ettiquette on whether the man should move the woman in with him?

 

What a the longest you've ever waited in a LDR to actually make that move? Was it worth it?

 

 

Thanks in advance..

[mhowe]

I wouldn't personally move.... ended a LDR after college because when he was going to graduate from Grad school...I didn't want.to move where he wanted to set up practice and he would not compromise either. It was 1.5 years living together then 2 years LD.

[JA0371]

I wouldn't personally move.... ended a LDR after college because when he was going to graduate from Grad school...I didn't want.to move where he wanted to set up practice and he would not compromise either. It was 1.5 years living together then 2 years LD.

 

If he would have moved , would you have given it a shot?

[mhowe]

I was in NY and wanted to move to Boston.

We did long distance for 2 years while he went to Chicago.

If he had been willing to start his career NOT in Syracuse with his daddy...I would have been flexible. He is still in Syracuse...35 years later.

[JA0371]

I was in NY and wanted to move to Boston.

We did long distance for 2 years while he went to Chicago.

If he had been willing to start his career NOT in Syracuse with his daddy...I would have been flexible. He is still in Syracuse...35 years later.

 

Lol....thanks. Makes sense.

[DancingFool]

If you're in or have been in a LDR, at what point did you decide a move needed to happen for one or both parties?

 

When things have become serious enough for a permanent future together such as engagement/marriage or permanent cohabitation if that's what floats your boat. Either way serious permanent relationship and not just a convenience thing.

 

Is there ettiquette on whether the man should move the woman in with him?

 

This is not and never about etiquette. This is about practical realities of life of who can move, what makes more sense, who can transfer their work and assets easier, etc.

 

What a the longest you've ever waited in a LDR to actually make that move? Was it worth it?

 

This is not about some set time parameters but a relationship naturally moving forward and progressing into something serious or not. One thing I find about LDR's, and I think is nice, is that they have an expiration date - either you are serious about staying together and take active steps in that direction or you part company because you don't see a future together after all. Yes it worth it, btw. However, the worth it was determined prior to the move.

[happpybear]

I have never done an LDR, but a friend of mine met her current BF online and they lived about 3 hours apart. The dated LD for about 1.5 yrs, they discussed moving to be together and decided to what until after a year at least (so the honeymoon stage was over) and he ended-up moving to be with her because there were more job opportunities in her city. She would have moved to his city if it was feasible, but it wasn't. They have been together for about 5 years now and will probably get married