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Need advice on HOT Russian girl I dated tonight


cdb1204

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No, she's not a mail-order bride or anything.

 

She contacted me on Match and has made comments about how impressed she was with my profile. I've gone out with a few ladies before who immigrated to the U.S. from other countries (South Africa, Poland, etc.) but nobody I felt any chemistry with or was really attracted to.

 

She was born in Moscow, came to the United States a few years back and divorced her husband here. She has an 11-year-old daughter.

 

I tried to engage her in conversation about why she she came here.....but she didn't feel comfortable discussing it (is that a red flag?). The rest of the date went well.

 

She's been texting me a lot the past week, and I've had thoughts that perhaps she was too needy. Before we even met, she was wanting us to go beyond my original plans of us just meeting at a coffee place and then go to a movie together and spend most of the afternoon together. I said no. I didn't say it to her, but I didn't want to commit myself to spending that much time with her if I didn't like her.

 

Halfway through the date my boss texted and said it was important that I send a file over within the next couple of hours. That was fine, as I still had about 30 more minutes to spend with this woman. I told her the date could only last about an hour.

 

She asked again why I'm still single. I told her about my bad experiences with women before....including a fight with one woman who, while I was giving her a tour of my work office after hours, demanded that I f*** her on my desk......which I refused to do. This woman took it as an insult that I didn't want her sexually, but I was more concerned about getting caught and losing my job.

 

This Russian girl's response upon hearing that (just the concept of having sex at work) "THAT is so hot."

 

Well......hearing her say THAT, combined with her interest in me and her being INSANELY HOT triggered some very potent, very strong sexual feelings and desires in me. She also smelled amazing with her perfume.

 

I have a higher than average sex drive for sure......I haven't had sex in a year and a half.....and I'm HUNGRY.

 

She kind of insinuated that she enjoys sex too.....or at least she said women have those urges too.

 

Well, it was time for the date to end. I had a massive hard-on, btw. I walked her to her car and, very uncharacteristic of me, I told her I was extremely attracted to her and wanted to kiss her. She let me. It was kind of an awkward first kiss, but it lasted a while and she didn't fight it. I was so damn horny I told her I wanted to make love to her.........Folks, I'm an extremely conservative man, never been promiscuous and this is VERY VERY uncharacteristic of me.

 

She said we'll see each other again, but, for now, I need to go back home and take care of what I need to take care of for work. She said she likes me as much as I like her.

 

I stopped at a gas station about 10 minutes later and sent her a text apologizing for coming on so strong (I felt it necessary to apologize, fearing I went too far)......she said not to worry and that she was glad I did what I did.

 

Folks.......I've never been in this situation before!

 

I've dated some very attractive women before, and I'm a good-looking man (a 7.5 or an 8 on a scale of 1-10, I've been told), but I've never been with a woman who could pass for a supermodel! I respect her.....but she triggers some intense feelings of sexual desire in me.

 

Am I wrong to have these feelings, and then act on them, like I am?

 

(I actually masturbated right before I left home to meet her because I was afraid I'd come on too strong, given how hot she was...remember "There's Something About Mary"?)

 

Finally.....this seems too good to be true.....is there something going on here that I'm not thinking about because (right now) most of the blood that should be in my brain is instead making me a walking hard on?

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I think it is a small red flag. You might want to see what her immigration status is. And also her financial situation. Sorry but there is something not quite right about her not wanting to share anything about that story. A high-level response could have sufficed, but she couldn't even give you that.

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I'm not sure what advice you are looking for? The date was good, you like her, ask her out again. Maybe you will get clarifications on her immigration status.

 

Right. While it may not be the OP's intention, this post is coming accross like a humble brag!

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To be honest with you she sounds like a complete sex freak just from what i've read. It's really shady though that she doesn't wanna tell you the circumstances about her immigration, i have a feeling she used the guy and bailed on him. Anyway it sounds like she's down for sex at least so if you're down for just that part (which sounds like you are and can't say i blame you if she's that hot) then i say more power to you, just tread carefully.

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I will look into her immigration status.....where do I go for that?

 

The U.S. State Department?

 

I was just thinking you could ask her. maybe on a later date. I don't know if the state dept will give out that sort of information but I guess you can try. Though even if you do, I'm not sure if they would be able to give you information on pending visa applications, if she has something in the works right now.

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But what do you want form this woman anyway? If she wants to get f...ed and you are willing to do that, go for it! Considering more, like a relatiosnhip I don t see any chance for that... I see trouble instead! But hey, if you think you should get in trouble for her just go for it!

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I will look into her immigration status.....where do I go for that?

 

The U.S. State Department?

 

LOL.. come on now... you only had ONE 1-hour date and you want to invade her privacy in such a serious way? How about get to know her, talk to her, give her a chance to know you at least a little bit, so she feels comfortable opening up to you??

Immigration is a traumatic experience for most, as nobody leaves their country because they are having the time of their life there. It is a sensitive subject that you shouldn't even have prodded about on a first date. I would most definitely not give any such details to a stranger, and I would find it rude if he kept prying.

If you like her, just treat her the same way you'd treat any other woman you met online: go out with her, without any pressure or expectations, get to know her, for all you know things wouldn't work out anyway with her in the long run. Just because she's hot it doesn't mean she is your potential future wife!

Get to know her, talk to her, and maybe slowly in time she will be more willing to reveal intimate details about her life before she met you.

No need for crazy investigations or jumping the horse. Wait to see first if a relationship is even in the cards for you two!

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Russian immigrant women with beauty are notorious for roping men up who have money or a good job that they suspect have money (there, i said it), this doesnt mean its a bad thing if she is loyal, but.. it could be a bad thing.

 

I dated a colombian immigrant who was gorgeous. I could do no wrong with her, and she did anything i said and pretty much told me anything i want she would do. Then things became funny where her trying to accelerate things so i can provide for her - tried to convince me to finish in her, talked about how she wants to live away from her roommate, etc. I pushed that thought away and said she needs to work on her issues herself, and ofcourse thats not what wanted to hear- so she became distant. She came around for sex, i did eventually catch her with her husband- which she never mentioned (on the streets).

 

Hate to say it, colombian, russian, domnican immigrants need to be watched.

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You started to talk about sex: telling a story that is borderline inappropriate for a 1st date. She did not freak out - yet you judge her for it??

 

Funny how men would bait women into talking about sex, and then get worried about the woman's character merely because she went along with a sexual conversation a man started.

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I tried to engage her in conversation about why she she came here.....but she didn't feel comfortable discussing it (is that a red flag?).
She may not be a mail order bride now, but I bet she was then. I'm not sure how long you need to reside in the States to become a citizen once you marry one, but it wouldn't surprise me at all that she latched on to some dude, used him to get citizenship or at least permanent resident status/bring her daughter over then dumped his ass. As much as I would like to believe that man was an innocent guy who really loved her and was devastated when she left him, a lot of men who go looking for RMOBs are not very nice guys -- which might be part of her reluctance to talk about it. Quite often, they're abusers who want someone under their control who has "traditional" values that they can keep chained in the house, cooking and cleaning (because North American women are all uppity feminists who don't know their place). Frankly, I don't think it matters what country the person comes from, you should always keep one eye open around someone who is not a citizen until you can determine that they are really interested in *you* and not a fast track to a better life in your country. Men do this to women, too, commit marriage/visa fraud.
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"Frankly, I don't think it matters what country the person comes from, you should always keep one eye open around someone who is not a citizen until you can determine that they are really interested in *you* and not a fast track to a better life in your country. Men do this to women, too, commit marriage/visa fraud."

 

You guys are really cynical. Sad really.

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I'm friends with several gorgeous Russian immigrants. None of them are gold diggers or any of that other crap. This thread is getting a bit out of control.

 

Back on topic: I'm with Annie - what exactly is your question? Continue to get to know her, stick to your personal morals and don't let her beauty cloud your judgement.

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My question is are there questions about her that I need to be posing about her past (not to her directly, at least not right now), especially given the fact that she is so reluctant to discuss WHY and HOW she came to the United States?

 

I've dated a few other women who immigrated from other countries. None of them were reluctant to discuss on the first date how they came here.

 

In my mind, this woman might have been part of a human trafficking ring, a mail order bride service, etc.

 

I want to know what I'm getting myself into, IF I continue to see her.

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