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Hi, basically i met this girl on holiday from Sweden about 7 months ago in Turkey, i slept with her at our hotel on the last night of my holiday and added her through facebook and started to get talking. I saw that her relationship status said she had a boyfried and explained to me She was 21 and at the end of a 4 year relationship, and they were kind of on a long break but the realtionship was pretty much over. After a couple of months talking ever day, she said that she wanted to come and visit me in England, Her boyfriend was traveling and had just got back, and i explained to her that she should only come stay with me for a few days if it was 100% what she wanted, and she needed to be really sure, she ended up finishing with him and coming here with a couple of friends and everything was really good. She told me from the start that she didnt want to overcomplicate things, and thats how it was.... To start with. I just saw it as this really hot Swedish girl coming over and having an amazing long weekend of sex. A couple of months down the line she came to stay again, with friends again but it was a little more intense, by this time we had spoken every day for almost 6 months on skype and facebook, when she got back she told me she thought she was falling for me, and then i started to change the way i felt about her, things were now complicated! I was always the perfect gentleman towards her, and i started to find myself falling for her too. Just before Christmas i went to Sweden to stay with her on my own, for over a week and i thought it was really amazing, i enjyed her company so much, and when i had to leave we both had a bit of a cry, i was devastetd, straight away she facebooked me telling me she already missed me... And we spoke about me going back there for new year.... A few days after getting back we talked on skype and she told me what days she had off of work and i booked my flight whilst on the phone to her, everything seemed good still, then a few days later everything changed... She called me out of the blue on skype and told me she didnt think it was a good idea that i came new year, she said it scared her how close we got when i stayed with her in Sweden, and it scared her how "real" things had became, i was crushed.. But i tried to understand, and i still wanted to talk to her. Slowly i got the feeling she wanted to talk to me less and less, and over christmas and new year, conversation with her felt harder and harder, eventually i asked if she had met someone else and she swore to me that wasnt the case, she said she really cared about me but she wasnt ready for a relationship with someone yet and she just needed a little space, i thought to myself " we are oceans apart how much space does she need!" It got to the point where i saw she liked a guys picture on facebook and i noticed he had recently been liking alot of her pictures too, i asked her if it was him she had been seeing and she got mad at me, explaining he was just a friend. I told her i was sorry and i hated how i was feeling pushed away by her, she said this isnt you and i told her that it might be a good idea if i didnt speak to her as much and she agreeed and told me maybe its for the best so i dont think about her as much. I told her to message me when she feels like it is for the best and she agreed. Almost 3 weeks on i still havent heard a thing from her, im feeling hurt, rjected, but really led on too, this girl spoke so sweetly to me every day for almost 7 months, then she just shuts me out of her life, im starting to become bitter about the whole situation but i dont want to fall out with her, i dont know what to do and could do with some female advice!

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Hmmm, there's a chance you were a rebound, considering she was fresh out of a 4 year relationship. That's why things moved fast in the beginning. But still, you guys met up how many times? one week on holiday, then another week after a few months. ?

 

I know it hurts to read but it looks like a holiday fling and/or rebound.

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We met on holiday, then she stayed with me twice here and I went to see her one time, but we spoke everyday for 7 months, I was really casual about things at the start, and she got really jealous when I told her I slept with someone else and it really hurt her, that's when things changed for me and I was starting to take it more seriously, I did ask her if I was a rebound and she said maybe to start with but she said I was amazing and she thought the world of me, now I feel she doesn't even want to talk to be, the whole things a , I just don't want my hurt to turn to angst

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What happened is that you two tried to turn a holiday romance into a relationship. I believe she really fell for you when she said she did but a long distance relationship, and especially after a 4yr relationship, is not easy...and, even more so, when you're only 21.

Your romance is over for now. Give her the space she wants and just send a message here and there if you want...and don't feel rejected. She didn't reject you. What she rejected was getting heavily involved with a guy who lives in another country. After a long term relationship ends, you need time to find yourself again. It's not about you..it's about her.

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The reason why she got mad when you asked about that guy liking her stuff on facebook is because you peeped her ruse and she's mad at you for seeing through her. She most certainly is seeing that guy---she was true blue with you for 7 months and then all of a sudden, she's not sure? She thinks things are going too fast and needs space? It's not like England is down the street and around the corner from Sweden and you can drop by unnanounced anytime. No, she's seeing someone else who lives closer to her and doens't have the stones to be truthful with you. It's her way of keeping you on the leash in case things with this dude don't work out, she can yank your chain and have you come running back.

 

Time to block her and be done with her.

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I have thought about blocking her from facebook, just to make things easier. I cant do it though i do really care about her still. I'm not sure if she is seeing that guy, i do believe her but its just seems a considence that i noticed him liking her pictures around the time she didnt seem so keen on talking to me. I was so casual about the whole thing at first, she got really jealous at the start when i told her i slept with someone else, and she even started talking about getting a job in England, thats why i am feeling angry bout the situation, she kind of made me fall for her, i could tell she always wanted to speak to me and now almost 3 weeks without contact, after leaving it in her hands i feel like shes not bothered about talking to me at all

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Yeah, but do you care about yourself and your feelings? It's funny how people would rather open a vein and bleed out than block someone on facebook because it might hurt the feelings of someone who has hurt them.

 

There is no such thing as coincidence. He is liking her pictures because she's dating him---or he knows he's got a real good chance of getting next to her.

 

She didn't kind of make you fall for anything--you fell or your own accord because of what you chose to believe about her. No one can make you do anything you don't already give youself permission to do.

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