Guys, realistically how long should I wait after 4th date to hear from guy??

[misslamb23]

Hi everyone, I'm new on here and just looking for some advice. For the past 3 weeks I have went on 4 dates with a guy who I met online. On our first date, we instantly clicked, so much so that we had our second date the next night at his place. Again it went great. Our fourth date was on Friday there and we went to see a play at the theater which was fun, throughout the play he held my hand, kissed me etc. Date 4 was initiated by me. When we're together he's really affectionate, always hugging or kissing me or making contact with me in some shape or form and playful and says really sweet things, however, all our communication between dates is online at the moment on a social networking site (FB) as I don't have a cell. When he left on Friday, he asked me to message him to let him know I got home ok. Which I did and we did some chatting however he was going to sleep as it was late. I just can't help this nagging feeling that I'm more into it than him. We haven't spoke since Friday night so I'm not sure if that's perhaps his way of saying he isn't feeling it as he's been online and posting pics, status updates etc so it's not like he's super busy. What do you guys think? And if you were into someone after the 4th date, would you still wait a few days before contacting them again? At the start we spoke more or less every day. Any advice from yous would be great, or if I've missed anything, feel free to ask

 

Thanks

[Batya33]

How long after date 3 did you initiate date 4 and why did you ask him out? I think it's fine that you did, just wondering if you did because you were waiting for him to ask first and he didn't.

[misslamb23]

Date 3 he initiated which was on a Thursday.. I then initiated date 4 a few days later after date 3 because he didn't. Any thoughts? x

[offplanet]

Listen to that nagging feeling you have that you're more into it than he is. He probably notices it too and it might be scaring him off. Don't initiate any more, just wait and see if he initiates. Personally, if I realized that the other person wasn't as into me as I was to him I would think it best to get out now, as it's a recipe for being hurt and messed around.

[misslamb23]

But I haven't gave him any clues that I'm into it more than him.

[missmarple]

But I haven't gave him any clues that I'm into it more than him.

 

Men aren't stupid. You initiated plans for date #4. That's enough for a guy to know you're into him.

I don't know if he's into you or how much he is into you or if he even thinks you care more than he does but some men prefer to be the ones who initiate, at least during the dating phase..and they're fine once you're in a relationship with them.

About this guy, the fact that he hasn't contacted you since Friday doesn't sound good.

Don't contact him yourself. Since you initiated the last date, it's his turn, so to speak. If he doesn't until the weekend, I'd forget about him and move on.

[Batya33]

Date 3 he initiated which was on a Thursday.. I then initiated date 4 a few days later after date 3 because he didn't. Any thoughts? x

 

OK that's why I asked. He probably knows you initiated because he hadn't yet so in his mind he most likely knows you're very into him. Therefore he has no reason to avoid asking you out again unless he's feeling a little overwhelmed by your level of interest and needs to take a step back (or is the type of guy who likes to do most or all of the initiating early on). I'd move on if you don't hear from him by Wednesday night and right now -this second - move on to the extent that you're actively seeiking and open to meeting new people.

[GinNJuice]

By date 3 or 4 if things haven't gotten progressed pretty far sexually(beyond kissing and "contact in some shape or form"), I may not completely lose interest, but I definitely start looking for others. There's usually a bit more time in between my dates than yours, but usually after a month, I assume a girl is only passively interested or an attention , if we haven't had sex or close to it, and will typically just let them initiate from that point. Not saying he's the same way, but he could be.