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Girlfriend says she does not care wether she has sex or not but still teases me.


rmiears92

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My girlfriend always teases me but never lets me 'touch' her or anything like that. She also says that she doesn't care if she has sex and she don't care if she gets pregnant. Confuses the heck out of me. She teases, she does all these things that get me going but she never delivers. Help me out here please. Shed some light on this for me cause I'm stumped.

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Kissing me on the neck, nibbles my ears, and rubs/scratches my back. All of which turn me on.

 

Occasionally kisses me in a seductive manner.

 

These are intimate activities that people engage in; nothing that is indicative of intention to "put out".

 

I'd guess she's not comfortable going further yet. Until she is, go have a wank if it's bothering you. Have a talk to her about it if you want to know how she's feeling.

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These are intimate activities that people engage in; nothing that is indicative of intention to "put out".

 

I agree. It's standard couple affection and none of those actions indicate sex is on the table. Now if the girlfriend was putting her hand down the OP's pants or discarding clothes, then it would be a different story.

 

I'd guess she's not comfortable going further yet. Until she is, go have a wank if it's bothering you. Have a talk to her about it if you want to know how she's feeling.

 

This is solid advice.

 

OP, you need to communicate. Tell her when she does "X" and "Y" it arouses you and raises your hopes for escalating things further. Then tell her you'd like to discuss next steps in your relationship regarding intimacy, and go from there.

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I think what she says and what she really wants are two totally different things. I think she may be the one that is actually confused. Maybe she is scared about getting pregnant and maybe she's scared of having sex because theres the fear of getting pregnant. Some girls have a war going on inside their mind. She may really want to have sex with you but when it comes down to it she's probably scared, even though she says she's not.

 

Have you guys ever had sex before? How long have you been together? Also has she had sex before ever? Because it sounds to me like maybe she hasn't and she's just scared of what could happen.

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I think what she says and what she really wants are two totally different things. I think she may be the one that is actually confused. Maybe she is scared about getting pregnant and maybe she's scared of having sex because theres the fear of getting pregnant. Some girls have a war going on inside their mind. She may really want to have sex with you but when it comes down to it she's probably scared, even though she says she's not.

 

Have you guys ever had sex before? How long have you been together? Also has she had sex before ever? Because it sounds to me like maybe she hasn't and she's just scared of what could happen.

 

I am not a virgin, she is.

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We have been together for over a month and a half now. Maybe it's just too soon. I'm not used to 'no sex' because in my previous relationship, sex was a very normal thing that happened almost daily. I'm tryin to understand it from her POV. I really am.

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I waited eight or nine months into my first relationship to have sex with my boyfriend. I was a virgin, so was he. Very awkward, but glad to wait. We knew we loved one another. She may not want to lose her virginity just yet, or maybe she wants to know that she loves you, etc...

 

Lots of things could be going on.

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We have been together for over a month and a half now. Maybe it's just too soon. I'm not used to 'no sex' because in my previous relationship, sex was a very normal thing that happened almost daily. I'm tryin to understand it from her POV. I really am.

 

Six weeks isn't a long time to be dating! She is a virgin so anticipating it now is too soon!

 

But there are enough red flags here to question whether you two are sexually compatible. She seems reluctant to (at best) or indifferent (at worst) at the prospect of having sex. Also, you two don't have open communication about sex and your expectations going forward. From an outside perspective, it sounds like she simply isn't ready to do it with you. Whereas, you are unhappily waiting and may be apt to pressure her for it going forward which can ultimately lead to resentment on both sides.

 

Bottom line, talk to her about your thoughts on sex and resign yourself to waiting until she is ready. If you're unwilling to do that then break up and find a girl who has a similar attitude toward sex that you do.

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Daily for someone is not normal, people and their sex life's are different. Especially because she is a virgin, and you are dating for a month and a half. If it was me - I wont have sex with you either.

And kissing is normal. So what - she MUST have sex with you each time she kisses you or you feel teased? The thing she told you about getting pregnant is odd, but everything else is fine.

Talk to her about that - that's my advice. And don't push her. Girls need a lot more then just penetration. Good luck.

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