Should I tell my boss that I am looking for a job?

[Zippy020]

I am kind of in an umcomfortable/complex situation at work and home.

 

I work at a college as an admin support. It is kind of like the first job that I applied to and accepted after completing my master's degree because I just needed something, and I feel like I could do much better. Although I really do like working here and my boss is really great and understanding and gets me involved in projects that I am interested in and will help me in the future.

 

Well for now I have been living with my parents because I just came back to the country after studying abroad for several years. They said I should stay there to save money to buy a place instead of rent. So that's what I did.

 

Now all of a sudden my parents decide to move to a different city. My current job does not pay enough to afford rent on my own. So I have to figure out what I am going to do. So my plan at first was to look for a job in the city they are moving to, but rent on my own anyways, as I do not want this to happen again and I just want to be on my own. After applying to several places for months, I hadn't heard anything back. I started to get stressed out and decided I would start looking in my current city for something that pays more so I can rent here.

 

So the other day I saw a job posting and thought, "wow this job looks like it was made for me!" I have every one of the requirements and feel like it would be very difficult that another candidate could match the requirements as well as I do. However this job is in my current city for 10 months and then you have to relocate to the other side of the country! I applied anyways because I feel like I would be taking a big step forward in my career, even though I have to move to the other side of the country.

 

So a couple of days after I applied to this job, I get a call from one of the places I applied to in the city my parents are moving to. They want me to go for an interview next Thursday. (this would have to be an all day event because the city is about a 4 hour drive from where I am now).

 

So even though I am quite confident that the other place will call me, I still want to go to this interview just to see what it is about and keep my options open. Between the two jobs I think I would prefer the one where I have to move to the other side of the country because I feel like I am moving forward, whereas the one in the closer city feels like I am moving into the same kind of job I am in now.

 

The problem here is if I go to the interview, I don't know what to tell my boss about why I have to miss the entire day. I was just sick a few weeks ago and got better, so it isn't very believable that I am sick for one day randomly. Also I am missing tomorrow to go to the city my parents are going to, to visit a relative who is flying in. (I booked this day off several weeks ago) So I can't use that as an excuse either. And then I am worried if the other place calls me, I will have to make up something else to attend an interview.

 

I was supposed to have my performance review on Tuesday at which point I was thinking of just telling my boss the truth: that my parents are moving and I do not make enough money to rent, so I need to look for a different job. Now she has rescheduled my performance review for friday (after the interview) because she is too busy before then.

 

Is it a bad idea to tell her I am looking at other options? If I don't tell the truth what should I say I am doing on thursday? I am afraid things will get awkward if I tell her...but also I know she is quite understanding. What would you do in my situation?

 

Also I am not sure when would be the best time to tell her this because I thought my performace review would be the perfect opportunity, since she will ask me about my future plans and what I want to do later in life etc...Now I am worried if I go to her with this she will get annoyed because she is busy and I am taking up her time.

 

To make matters worse, this is quite possibly the worst timing I could be leaving this position. As we are a 3 person team. One other employee has just left, so we are hiring someone for March for that position. My boss is going to be on vacation for the last 2 weeks of February, so that doesn't leave much time for me to find a job, giver her notice and for her to hire someone else into my position. I kind of feel bad that I would be leaving her alone to train 2 new people. But I don't really have a choice because my parent's house is going up for sale in February!

[lavenderdove]

Remember, just getting called for an interview may not translate into the job... they may be interviewing 10 people and only 1 will get the job.

 

Never tell your boss you are looking for a new job! The only time I have ever been fired is when where I was working found out I was looking for a new job (someone called my place of employment even though i'd told them not to), and they fired me on the spot saying, 'if you don't want us, we don't want you.' (i.e., acting more like a rejected lover than a job)!

 

People can be very strange for any kind of rejection, and most places do understand that they should not call your place of employment unless you give them permission to... It can make your boss angry and have them start persecuting you, or they could write a bad review that is on your permanent record because they are angry about you wanting to leave.

 

You can give other references, just not your current job. You only tell your current boss when you give your two week notice. That is the norm for etiquette when you quit a job. These interviews may lead to job offers, and they may not, so you need to handle it with discretion.

 

Perhaps you can share a house (i.e., rent a room in someone's house) which is cheaper than your own apartment if you can't afford it on your salary, and do that until you get a new job and can afford better.

[Moontiger]

The ONLY time I was every open about looking for a job while employed was when I was working part time. My boss understand and was very open about the fact that I would eventually move on to full time work. He even sent me job postings in the field.

 

But in this case lavenderdove is correct. Keep it to yourself until its a for-sure thing and then give your two weeks.

[mhowe]

Your boss may be friendly....but is not your friend. NEVER tell a boss you are looking.

[Catherine_3]

My boss knows I'm looking for another job and she's actively helping me find one.

 

I don't think these hard-and-fast rules are as hard-and-fast and people sometimes believe.

 

But in your situation, you have nothing to gain by telling her. You'll just have to make something up. I personally don't like to lie (ie: calling in sick when you're healthy) so I would normally say there is a personal emergency you need to attend to and leave it there. The sooner you can let her know, the better. And then make sure you work extra hard on other days to get your stuff done and make sure you've planned well in advance so people can cover off for you.

[pl3asehelp]

I don't think it would benefit you in any way so I wouldn't do it. Admin jobs are big on 'being there' so if they know you're looking they could get spooked and start looking for your replacement now and if they find one, they won't wait for you to leave.

[Zippy020]

Thanks for the advice.

 

I feel like she will understand why I am leaving. She knows my situation of living with my parents and she knows I do not make enough to pay rent on my own (she mentioned this in a casual conversation once). My thinking was that I could maybe even use her as a reference if I tell her.

 

Once there was a situation for maybe going to a different position in the same college and I mentioned it to her. She didn't seem happy about it but she said she would never prevent me from doing what I wanted to do.

 

Another thing is that this is the 2nd position I have had at this school(my former position was abolished during budget cuts and I was able to move up) so if I ask for my previous supervisor's recommendation, this might make its way to my current boss since they often attend the same meetings.

[Catherine_3]

I feel like she will understand why I am leaving.

 

It's not really about "understanding". You're putting yourself at risk if you let her know you're not sticking around, and then you don't get an offer elsewhere. It's not so much about hurting her feelings. It's more about just protecting your security and your work.

[annie24]

The problem here is if I go to the interview, I don't know what to tell my boss about why I have to miss the entire day.

 

I might be vague and say that you have a family emergency, or just take a sick day. Say you woke up with a bad stomach and need to take the day off.

 

When you get an offer is when you should tell.

 

I'm actually in a position where you do tell your boss when you are looking for a job, but that is because this job is temporary (few years max), like an internship of sorts, and of course, you can't stay there forever. Typically, we actually give 6 months notice, sometimes more. It's not a surprise to anyone, and actually, it's expected that the boss helps with the job search as well.

[Zippy020]

Thanks everyone. I have decided to follow your advice and not tell her. Have asked for the day off so I will see what she says...

 

I have been asked to provide 3 references for this interview. Do you think it is safe to ask my previous supervisor at this same organization? I could ask her to keep it confidential.

[Catherine_3]

yes ask her

[Zippy020]

Help! I am really stressing out! I asked my previous supervisor for a reference and if she could keep it confidential. She said that she would prefer that I ask my current supervisor.

 

Now I am stressed out about how I am going to provide 3 supervisory references (when she was the only supervisor I was going to use in the first place) and also worried that she is going to go and tell my current supervisor!

[mhowe]

She isn't going to tell her --- but she isn't going to do it.