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Why is she ignoring me?


OfficialElex

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Ok first read this

I saw her post an hour later from when it was posted, but the image said:

"Every seconds soaked in sadness, every weekend is a war."

Her description was: Idk if I can do this anymore. I'm so sad, and I fell like there's

nothing left. I tried to stop thinking that, but idk anymore. #seenitallbefore#bmth#sad#cutting#suicidalthoughts

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So like I said, an hour later I saw it and here is the convo:

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Me: Are you still feeling sad Katie?

Her: Yeah... Some stuff just happened

Me: What happened?

Her: Friend troubles...

Me: Like are they ignoring you? Or?

Her: Yeah. They used to be so kind and loving, but now it's like none of it matters

Me: Do you know why they are ignoring you? Or did they just started doing it without

telling you the reason?

Her: They just started

Me: Strange, maybe just giving them some space for a little while will help things out.

They could be going through with some stuff in their personal lifes and or just want to be

alone for a bit. Try talking to them on monday and see what happens, was Megan from our IPC class

one of them?

Her: Yeah. But she does that all the time. She does have stuff she's going through so I give her space

Me: Ah just see what your other friends do on monday, or try texting them to see whats up...

like why they ignored you and stuff

Her: Okay... Thanks

Me: Yw, but come on Katie, cheer up! You're an amazing person! I doubt it is they don't

want to be your friend. So don't let this make you feel down.

Her: Okay...

Me: Are you having suicidal thoughts?

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I paused here because she didn't reply the rest of the night, she did see the message though.

I was really worried about her, but I know space is a big key in friendships, so I just let her go there

The next day I was taking a nap around 12ish-1ish, and right when I was about to go back to sleep at 1 I heard

my phone go off, and she texted me saying:

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Her: I was... But I'm okay now. And Brandon I really wanna thank you. You're always looking out for me. Not

many people do that. So Thank you

Me: You're welcome Katie

Her:

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I'm starting to see she's starting to open her mind more and more, which is a good thing

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UPDATE (Please Read!)

That conversation was last Saturday. Yesterday in class (we had 1 class together) she walked in and purposely didn't give me eye contact. I feel like she is ignoring me and I have no idea why! Our last conversation went super well and now she acts like she doesn't want to talk to me? Can someone tell me what's up?

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Well i have no idea how long you've know or been friends with this... katie?

 

if katie has these issues such as depression/cutting, yes you're bound to get these 'ignoring' days/moments from her.

Sometimes people like that can feel a whole range of feelings/emotions and get all confused so they can back off.

If she is acting out this way.. leave her be. See how she is in a day or so, if she comes around. I really dont think there's a really big reason she's ignoring you...

 

I asked if you known her long? because if you have, then i think you'd have seen this behavior before??

 

If she is depressed, she should be seeking some counselling and especially if she's cutting! That can get very risky if she doesn't. She's going to need help sorting herself & her issues out in life, especially at this age. (teen yrs).

 

If you can get talking to her again.. pls discuss this with her. Highly suggest she see a therapist for these issues.

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I have known her for.. 5-6 weeks now.. she used to cut but doesn't now and I have been here for her everytime shes feeling down, I feel like she trusts me, but its just weird how she has been ignoring me.. yesterday and today o.o I'll tell you exactly what she does tomorrow in class. But any other advice? Every little bit helps me a lot!

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She is ignoring you because she feels embarrassed/awkward that she shared her personal thoughts with you when she was feeling depressed. Now she is feeling ok she doesnt want to even think about it! And you are now a reminder of those thoughts.

 

The fact she is opening her mind to you is not a very good thing. You are not a professional counsellor trained to deal with people/ situations like this so you could make things worse. She needs a professional to talk to, not a well meaning 'friend' so dont make a bad situation worse by trying to fix someone when you do not have the professional skills to do so, however much you like her or want to help... If you want to things to move on from this awkwardness between you, be cheerful and get on with your day and forget about it, like she is trying to do.

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Hey, so today in class she never made eye contact with me. But never seemed pissed in a way.. she seemed energetic and happy in a way. I really have no idea what I did. Do you think it would be good just to give her space? I don't want to bother her. Also I think the girl she likes is mad at her.. because Katie has been hanging around where my friends are.. and not with that one girl. I can't even sit over there now because she sits there. I sit with my old football "Friends". She actually did do this before, but it was because I accidentally scared her. I asked her if I could see her after school the following friday and I guess she thought I was going to ask her out. So she ignored me. But this time I HAVE no idea what I did -.-. It makes me mad how she treats me like utter s***.

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What you are being right now is a selfish friend. You're not the one dealing with the personal issues and problems to the point that you want to cut and/or kill yourself. Whether you've known her for 5 days or your entire life it's a huge deal when you want to take your life.

 

And now you are mad because she is "treating" ... you like sh**? She's in a sh**ty state right now. If you're not confident enough or enough of a friend to see that and be there when you can, then what really IS your ulterior motive? Be the white knight long enough for her to see all you do is care and think about her, and fall deeply in love with you? I presume this is the case as this is: in the Dating forum, and you also mention in your posts having liked her or asking her out or something... In fact, after reading your posts, somehow you've managed to put yourself into her problems and make them your own by wondering if her actions has anything to do with you and what not.

 

And Brandon I really wanna thank you. You're always looking out for me. Not

many people do that. So Thank you

 

The only "proof" you need if you're doing something wrong. Now go back to enjoying your life and being the fun outgoing friend that she would want to hang out with again and not be reminded of sadness and pain like that. It has zero to do with you, and everything to do with her right now.. this week, last month, and onward.

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No I disagree ~ you are not a selfish friend:

 

I'm waiting for her to be sad again because you don't talk to her. She's issued. You can't fix her young man so don't even try. No matter how many "nice" talks you have with her. Unless she's getting the therapy that she needs, then she will always be wondering why someone has ditched her when in reality they're just discovering that they can't help her and they're distancing themselves from the moods. Harsh but most likely the truth.

 

Why haven't you gone up to her in class and asked her how she's doing? Why are you avoiding her just because she's not making eye contact with you? A simple, Hi Katey, hows it going today" is warranted. If she outright ignores you then, well then you have good indication that she's in some kind of dark mood that she'll be blaming you for and she is the only one that can tell you what that may be. Asking us will get you no where but more confused and probably feeling guilty when you are wrongly blamed for simply wanting a friend. Sadly this friend you want takes from you emotionally while being unable to give that back due to her current emotional deficit within.

 

Guessing is not what you need to remedy this situation so talk to her. Start with "Hi" Don't do it unless you can know without a doubt that you can not save her, fix her, make her undepressed.

 

Is she getting the professional help she needs to help her overcome her current dismal state? If she isn't then you'd be better off just letting her fade and find someone else to be "a friend" to. She's not capable of forming and then maintaining anything of the romantic kind with you in her present state.

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