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Some advice that's helping me recover from my BU


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I've started to notice in myself that when i read other peoples post about break ups and asking what they should do i can answer it more easily even if the situation seems the exact same as mine. When i look at someone else going through something similar and i can offer advice that i should be also giving to myself. But then when i look at my own situation i just can't seem to be logical and i can't do what i would tell myself is the healthiest and most correct choice. So i guess what i'm trying to tell those who are going through a breakup and need advice try and say something in response to people who have similar situations to you. Sometimes you'll realize you should be telling yourself the same things and it's really helped my healing process.

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So right Charity-

 

I've come to realize.. all we say, suggest etc, Yes, it is good information... BUT until we actually 'arrive' at that spot, ourselves, we won't understand what is being said/suggested. At that point, is when we see it, experience it ourselves then actually understand what it is, the other's are saying and why.

 

Like anything else, those who are aware and do know what to expect or what happens if or when. Say all for good reason and it's knowledge. Whether we choose to go by those words is our own choice and know we'll have to deal with the results.

 

I often think.... even though we know or were warned, in ways, we do still have to experience it ourselves to understand then go from there. ie. breaking NC. Guess sometimes, it's just a way of life and our weaker half wins.

 

Anyways.. it's all helpful the stuff I read on here and can sometimes offer my own view or knowledge to something. Doesn't mean that person is going to listen to suggestion and i can understand that.

 

Life.. sigh... sometimes it can get so difficult.

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yeah i find it interesting how when i first posted here i came expecting answers and now i come hoping for advice... Sometimes you can see it in people they want the answer to their problem but there almost always just isn't a easy way out. Hell when i first started posting here (which wasnt very long ago) i was only seeking pity. Why didn't i come hoping for advice? I'm not sure, but looking back it seems like it would've been the right thing to do. Of course i decided to do what i WANTED not what would be healthy and i broke NC ive been in NC again for about a month and im really starting to feel healthier in my day to day attitude. I'm regaining confidence i'm listening to advice and trying my best to be honest with what i really want. I don't want my ex back, i want to prove to her that she wants me back and that just isn't a healthy way of thinking. Everyone has their own opinions and views on things and it's really interesting to see how different people think different scenarios should be approached i find it refreshing to give my outlook on something and to be thanked for it, it's a major confidence booster when you are feeling so broken from someone shattering your confidence.

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