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I will be the death of myself.


shesmiled

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I figured that i was an introvert a couple of years ago. it brought my mind a bit of comfort to know that i wasn't the only one and that i certainly am not going crazy.

 

to boil it down, in my path of life my personality is certainly driving me a bit mad- i mean to the point i'd rather be alone and sometimes i prefer to carry full conversations with my psyche. (NOT A SKITZO!) but my own conscience. My introvertism mixed with past history of rejection, trust issues, fear, and self rejection, and chronic depression halts every single growth in my life. I'm afraid to let anyone in my personal life to the point i have no friends. i constantly bewilder my past love because now i don't trust him neither love him. i still talk to him because im afraid to be alone. he lies to me that he's single to sort of comfort my suspicion against him. (which i don't blame.) but it hurts at the same time that he uses me and to know that he does.

 

yes i know, "see a therapist" but can anyone offer advice comforting to me at the moment? something i can cling to till the morning? before i commit myself to another pill to swoon me to sleep so that i "try" and forget this misery?

 

seeking help. tired of this lifestyle!

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Well difficult issues can't be solved easily. I recommend you read the book 'Quiet' by Susan Cain. Being an introvert is wonderful. Sounds like have some other issues though. If you're depressed and you pop pills without also doing psychotherapy I think you're just putting a band aid on the problem and should realistically not expect your life to improve much. Anything of value takes effort - aren't you worth it?

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