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How Should I feel about this Second Date Request?


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Hello everyone,


I met this girl at a party two months ago. Long story, but we ended up meeting up for drinks last Friday. Then 1st date (her idea) was at my place for sushi Wednesday. We made out, did some heavy petting


While at my place, at the end of date, I suggested dinner on Saturday. She seems really busy (legit), on call 24/7 and said sounds good, would get back to me Thursday to confirm. (In the back of my head, I think 'well she didnt hedge when I asked for her first date...")


Her and I texted after date, then in AM. No confirmation on Saturday. Then at 9pm I get


HER [Picture of her dinner] "Sirachachacha!"

ME know how to push my buttons

ME: Sriracha is an amazing mistress

HER: Like mistress/dominatrix or mistress/kept woman. I'm confused.

HER: Like the burning hot pain/feels so good or like the pleasurable taste / will cost you alot

ME: I love where youre going with this

ME: Official date ask ™ Saturday 6pm (this is a joke back from our first meeting where she teased that i never ask officially)

HER: Hahahaha I love that mistress and sriracha is what prompted an official date ask

ME: Always does. So that's a yes. When do I pick you up.

HER: Hahahaha. It would be a solid yes if my schedule of managing other people's lives doesnt get in the way.

HER: I might have to go to Houston this weekend. But yes until I get a final answer

ME: It's a genuine date (again a call back to inside joke). Lemme know if you need to resched.

HER: Oh la la!


Do you all have any thoughts on why she's hedging (She left herself an 'out' AND didn't tell me where to pick her up,) or how I should feel about it? I hate that I'm on the hook for a Saturday date that she may just back out of...

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You knew that with her schedule it's a possibility. Even while in a relationship, my work schdule changes depending on the tasks that need to get done. One time I didn't get home until 3:30am.


Does that bother my girlfriend, no. As long as I tell her ahead of time, that my schedule may change, she's fine when it occurs.


I'm not sure about the numbering of the dates. Met at a party, then met for drinks, then had a 1st date? Shouldn't the drinks have been the first date?


You've seen her three times and went out with her twice. By this point in time, her schedule may really be a factor. Is she a nurse or some kind of manager?


Best advice, is be patient and don't hold anything against her. Whether or not something happens this weekend, be prepared for it. And try again later. That will be when you know she's not feeling you.


For now it all sounds great.

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She told you she might have to go to Houston this weekend. So if she does, you will not go on date. If she doesn't have to, you will. I don't see her as hedging. CHILL!!!



If you wanted something more solid, maybe you could have said "How about if you don't go to Houston..Saturday night. If you do..how does Tuesday night sound? I know you have to get up for work, but what about checking out that dessert place for an early night?"



But right now, I would relax. She will get back to you soon to let you know.

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I feel (and I could be wrong), Gin doesn't want you to put all your energy, hopes, and desires into one person. If you are not exclusive, then you should be open to alternate opportunities.


Agreed. Even if her schedule is a legit conflict with her social life, that might not work for you. Take things slow and see if you're compatible.

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