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finding ways to talk, keep at it? opinions from guys please!


Ginger1

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I like this guy and I think he finds me amusing enough So I have been trying to think of ways/reasons to talk to him. It's kind of complicated, we work together, kind of, but we really have zero reason for interaction as our jobs are way/completely different. As in it would be odd for me to just go to where he is and start talking [about work].

He does mechanical stuff and lately we've had crazy cold weather and a bunch of pipes and stuff have froze/busted/gone to hell in my house and need fixing....... Perfect opportunity to talk to him and borrow things from the shop!

I find myself thinking up these other projects to do just so I can go see him and ask to borrow something/ask for advice. I've probably done this on 4-5 different occasions. Such as, this tree limb was kind of low near the phone wire on my house, so I asked to borrow a ladder to chop it down... And it's not like some dude asking him for stuff, I'm a girl, and though I'm not all ditsy/girly, I don't really look like a lumberjack kind of girl. Most guys are like "what the heck are you doing???"

I don't know, should I keep at it or give up? He's always really nice when I interact with him and he will joke around too, he's quite funny-which doesn't help my crush, but he doesn't exactly encourage me to stick around and talk more. You know what I mean? I think if he did indeed like me, I think he would be more inquisitive or ask more about what I was doing to prolong our conversation. yes/no? guys opinion??

Thanks!

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I don't know, should I keep at it or give up?

he doesn't exactly encourage me to stick around and talk more.

I say give it up because it makes you look desperate (which is not very appealing to anyone) and in fact has the opposite effect by chasing people away. The very fact that he's not encouraging you to stick around says it all (imo) and I think you should take note of that. I think it's time to back off.

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Ok Cool, I appreciate the advice. I don't want to seem desperate! Definitely not! He definitely knows who I am, but honestly I might say something to him like 2 twice a month, over the past 6 months, and give a 'wave' occasionally if I drive by in the truck.

So hopefully I haven't seemed clingy or desperate yet I'll leave him be

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Tell him you want to jump his bones.... you asked for a guys advice, right? I would be dishonest if i didnt say a woman saying this to me would get my attention. Usually its women who know how to attract a man - not men, i always see posts of one sex asking the opposite sex on how to attract the opposite sex, i find that odd.

 

Ok, sorry... probably not what you wanted to read, but i can add i do work with mechanical stuff and i had a receptionist trying to get me to notice her. She would ask me for my name, if i had kids, where i lived at - she made it obvious that she was gunning for me. She once told me about how she could fix this and that - i just stood there like... ok? That really didnt turn me on. She was just flat-out aggressive with me with no fear or rejection, when she finally asked me if i had a girlfriend is when i knew for a fact she wasnt just flirting for fun- then i asked her for her phone number. I would recommend just asking him if hes seeing someone and read his reaction, if he doesnt make a move after that, or at least shows some interest or gets shy... then bow out and leave him be.

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^lol thanks for the tip. I'm definitely not aggressive though haha

To be honest with myself I am not really even set on 'dating' anyone. My situation is one where I'll probably be moving to a new state for a different project in a few months. I just think he's a really cool guy and hey, if I am just able to chat and joke around as friends now and again, that's fine with me. Because of my work, I don't have any friends out here so I really miss just joking around with people-in person. All my co-workers are older men at least 2x my age, which is fine they have their own type of humor certainly, but eh.

Last night I was working kind of late and he and a few others from the shop were having a beer outside. He actually came up to me to say "hey", I was cleaning out my truck and my dog was running around. He's keen on my dog. So I showed him my dog's new [impressive] trick and chatted for a moment. I'm not a 'flirty' kinda girl...at all, just chatting. I'll leave this be for what it seems to be- acquaintances I guess! Too bad because he is a cutie

thanks y'all

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I would just be forward with him. He will not turn you down unless you're hideous or he's gay

HAHA. too funny.

Yeah we'll see, sometimes when I start to care less, I start to act like my normal self and it's way easier for me to talk to others and others to talk to me.

This morning I was driving out to the site and he passed me, honked his horn and waved. I didn't realize it was him till he passed.

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  • 2 weeks later...

Ok well small anti climactic update lol. I've seen this guy a couple times since I last posted and I think I have succeeded in being normal! Haha, I mean I just act like he is any other person who I can carry a conversation with.

Today I had a truck issue and he was helping me with that, we had a good coversation and he was actually asking me some questions. And yeah, I'll admit that I have been collecting various things to say to him over the past few days just in case I saw him, lessen the odds for awkward silence. He isn't super outgoing and chatty as some guys. I'll optimistically say he was taking way longer to fix the thing than needed so I could actually talk. When he was done he went back inside and I was getting in the truck to leave, he comes back out and stands at my window for another minute or so and says bye to me and my dog and even half jokingly asks my dog if he wants to come spend a night with him. (and yes I totally use my dog as ploy to talk to him !)

So hey, I'll take it. I'm just glad to have the opportunity to talk to someone who's not an old man.

There are a handful of other gals out here, but honestly they are all rumored to be kinda trashy/ty, and I try not to be judgemental, but they do seem like it. So I constantly try to NOT be seen like that, which means I keep to myself and don't talk a lot. So it's a tough balance when I DO kinda want to flirt with someone.

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