Jump to content

Is he still interested? Or am I completely clueless?


Recommended Posts

I have an honest question for you guys... I am okay with brutal honesty, and this is my favorite forum so I figured I'd ask here.


Backstory: I'm moving to Europe (a certain country which I won't name for anonymity--also for anonymity this isn't my main account) in 9 months. I've planned this move for about two years, and about 8 months ago I found a cool website for it. All that info! Friendly locals! Ways to learn the language! I was hooked.


I met an awesome guy on that site about 7 months ago, and we've kept in almost daily contact since. There are days we don't talk but if so, it's because we're both busy and/or out of town. For the first three months, we spoke all the time for hours a day and he actually told me he was developing feelings for me. It was like almost constant contact and he said he loved everything about me. I felt the same way. It looked like things were heading into "ok, once we meet in person, we're going to immediately be together" territory.


After those three months where things went really quickly, we both kind of took a step back (him moreso than me), though we're still in frequent contact, call each other, Skype, send pictures, etc. He knows I am visiting his country for a month in June (not to worry--I'll be an hour from him. My main objective in moving there is not him; it's always been school and work) and we plan to meet up.


The thing is, I'm not sure if he's still into me. Hear me out: though we speak almost daily, it's not as intense as those first three months. He said he wants to date me in person and get to know me (which I am so cool with, and agree with), but it's weird to me that we don't speak as much or as intensely as we used to. I'm not even sure if that's the right word. He used to say things like "I love everything about you" and now while he still says he loves me, it's not as often. I asked him if he wanted to take a weekend trip with me to another country (an hour flight away--I have family in this other country) when I'm there in June and he said he would let me know, was not saying no, not to worry, and that he just needed to think about it.

Bonus aside: He's told his family about me (they've even said hi to me on Skype), and all his friends know too. They joke with him when he's texting me and say "oooooh, you're talking to heeeeer!" like he's in high school... haha.


Though sometimes he's a bit unresponsive and it's definitely not like it was at first. That said, whenever he goes out with friends he spends time texting me, this past New Year's he texted me immediately at midnight saying he wished I was there, if he gets drunk he immediately drunk dials me to talk, we have phone sex and he still says he loves me and he can't wait to see me. But... like I said, sometimes he's not as responsive as he used to be. It might take him a couple of hours or even a half day to respond whereas before it was almost immediately. I just feel like I'm getting some mixed signals and I don't know if he's still into me but really does want to take it slow or if he's just trying to phase me out. If it's the former, I'm okay with it and think it's a really good idea to take it slower.


Is he just being cautious and he really does like me?


TL;DR: I like a guy who I haven't met, and we're very affectionate but I sense him pulling back. Is he still into me, but just being cautious?

Link to comment
Share on other sites


This topic is now archived and is closed to further replies.

This topic is now closed to further replies.
  • Create New...