Is it bad that I love feeling nostalgic?

[midnightdeirdre]

Sometimes when I watch a movie that I watched A LOT growing up---whether it was during a painful time or a happy time---it makes me happy to feel wistful for another time. (If it was a painful time, the nostalgia makes me greatful that the time has passed.)

 

I actually posted a similar thread about 3 years ago:

 

When I was 16, I went to a childhood's friend's house, and being back there made me feel extremely nostalgic. (I haven't been to her house in awhile, but I'm sure when I do I will feel the same way.) Thing is...is it bad thing? (Or rather, unhealthy that I love feeling this way?)

 

I'm sure many of you will say, "As long as it's not interferring with your present life, you're fine." Well, I guess I feel that it is. (Or that it definitely does, when it happens.)

 

In elementary school, I was obsessed with the 1950s. A friend's mother even said, "I don't blame her---the 50s was an incredible time."

 

The only real bad time that reminicing bit me in the butt was when I attended beauty school last year---during a few classes, I talked about a few memories I had from junior high that fit in with our discussions. Later on, a girl at lunch asked me if I was offended about something she had said a few days prior. I said, "I don't know; I don't remember that." To which the girl replied, "Well, you remember stuff from 6th grade, not stuff from a few days ago?..."

 

Best,

Tulipwriter

[Thorshammer]

I love nostalgia! I kept all my old videogames and comics, i guess thats like a low level of hording, but i do not part with these things. I watch movies i have already watched, like The Goonies (i think of my dad and being a twirp running around) GhostBusters (my boyhood obsession) i actually watch A LOT of cartoons from back then; Garfield and friends, Ghostbusters, Ninja Turtles, Might Max, etc. I get super happy doing these things, sometimes i wake up and get ready for work and play these toons in the background just to have background stuff going on. I love it.

 

I dont think its a bad thing, unless you do this because you fear the future. You dont like change so you hold on to the past, and if you believe you escape the world and find peace with these old windows of time - then i can see a problem there. I guess thats like hording but with memories.

[midnightdeirdre]

You dont like change so you hold on to the past, and if you believe you escape the world and find peace with these old windows of time - then i can see a problem there.

In which case, what would be done to fix the problem?

[Thorshammer]

In which case, what would be done to fix the problem?

 

I dont know... i have a little bit of that too, i dont like change and i miss a lot of my past. But i function and I accept change as an inevitability. I only mention it because i know humans tend to go to the extreme with everything, and an extreme in anything is almost always a bad thing.

 

So as though you have a grasp on reality, and know that change is real and you accept it, then i dont see a problem with having a little window into the past that can give you a little smile here and there.

[midnightdeirdre]

I do see a couselor, whom I am seeing this week. I will run this by her and get her opinion.

[browneyedgirl36]

I have some of this, definitely. When I'm feeling sad or lonely -- or sometimes even when I'm feeling fine -- I recall past good memories and do things, like watch a certain TV show or listen to certain music (for me it's the 80's station -- I was in junior high and high school back then!) that bring me back. Christmas was always a GREAT time around my house when I was a kid, so even though I'm in my 40's now, I try to hold on to a bit of that -- baking the same cookies my mom used to make (and that, when we were old enough, my sister and I baked with her), listening to certain music, watching the animated Christmas specials on TV (I'm 43, and I'm a giant kid). It just reminds me of a wonderful time in my life -- I LOVED being a kid, and I think it's OK to re-live that sometimes. I still love stuffed animals, and cartoons, and board games. All of these things bring me back to good times.

 

As far as it interfering with your life, I don't see how it could, unless you are doing it so much that you are completely out of touch with reality or can't bear the thought of your "real" life in the adult world. If this is the case, then I think your counselor could help you. I think, though, that in general, this kind of thing is totally normal.

[midnightdeirdre]

I LOVED being a kid, and I think it's OK to re-live that sometimes. I still love stuffed animals, and cartoons, and board games. All of these things bring me back to good times.

I loved being a child ~ age 6 and younger. When I hit age 8, that's when my life took a turn for the worse. My school and home life both started to get bad, and I became clinically depressed as a result. (Every spring & summer starting at age 8, I would get these overwhelming feelings of saddness and guilt. Not understanding them, I'd run into the bathroom and cry. After doing this for weeks in secret, I finally confessed to my mom about what I was doing.) Things just went from bad to worse ~ at age 9 I began stuttering, my body became a bit chubby, and I was tormented daily for my tastes in music and movies. When I hit 13, my self-esteem was 10 feet below the ground. When I hit 14, a miracle happened---school got easy, I had legit friends, my body finally grew into itself, and I had self-confidence. (Things went downhill again the next year, but I won't get into that.)

 

As far as it interfering with your life, I don't see how it could, unless you are doing it so much that you are completely out of touch with reality or can't bear the thought of your "real" life in the adult world. If this is the case, then I think your counselor could help you. I think, though, that in general, this kind of thing is totally normal.

What I underlined and made bold is may be what I've been experiencing. I see my counselor on Wednsday, Jan 8th; I will post here what she says.

[browneyedgirl36]

I think it's a good idea to talk to your counselor. It sounds like you have some things you're trying to cope with and you're having trouble doing that. It's totally OK -- sometimes we can't do it all on our own, and we need some help.

 

I hope your counselor is able to help. Have you told her about the bullying and stuff that happened when you were younger? I was bullied too, and I talked to a therapist about it a few years ago -- it helped a lot.

[midnightdeirdre]

Have you told her about the bullying and stuff that happened when you were younger?

I've actually seen many counselors over the years---since age 16---and only a select few have actually helped me. With all of them, i told a lot about the emotional abuse I endured growing up. The counselor I see now is named Heidi---she always makes me feel better, no matter what.

[midnightdeirdre]

Today I realized: One reason I love feeling nostalgic is because it makes me feel very creative. Being an author and an artist, that makes sense.