Jump to content

Feeling like things are only getting worse.


GraceRedd

Recommended Posts

I am really in need of some comfort from anyone.

Long story short, the guy I was certain I would marry broke my heart and started dating one of our mutual friends. There's A LOT of details, but he and I have been through so much. I left home to escape my bad relationship with my father and lived with him for quite sometime until I was forced to leave to deal with other circumstances. He was the only person I could count on in my life and I over whelmed him. If you're interested in knowing the full story, I have posted it in a thread, but no one takes the time to read it. Basically, I have no one to talk to. It's been over a month of no contact. Yesterday, his new girlfriend texted me and said she was just checking in to see how I was and how my break had been. I felt very patronized by this. I responded politely, but felt she only contacted me to make herself feel less guilty. I don't think she considered it would hurt me which it did. Anyway, I'm almost certain this pain is worsening with each day. I just want him and I to work on things because we both had invested so much into our relationship. I love him unconditionally. It hurts to not have that feeling returned. I have been informed since the beginning of November, (when we broke up) he has been acting different and many people are concerned about him. I just need any words from anyone because I've been feeling lately like I'm sort of wasting away and hoping that I wake up and have heard from him or not wake up at all. Please, someone.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

It's terrible when what we feel for someone else isn't returned in kind, but we can't force emotions onto someone (otherwise it wouldn't be free-will or love).

 

As difficult as it is, and it is, trust me, you need to make every effort to pull yourself together and get your life back on track. This likely isn't the advice you'd like to hear, but it's the advice that works. Building a life around someone else never works out in the long term, not in a healthy way at least. And when those relationships end we're even worse off because we don't have anything to fall back on because that person literally was our life!

 

You can't allow yourself to worry about what he's doing, so don't contact him. If he truly wanted to be with you he would, but his being apart from you is evidence enough of where he stands. His loss.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

I think you hit it in one.

 

She feels guilty and doesn't want to. So she's hoping you'll respond in a way that will make her feel better.

 

Block her number, block his number, and block them on any social media. Hearing from or about them feels like crap. There will be bad days, worse days, and days that almost feel survivable for a while. It sounds like losing the relationship for you is compounded by losing, in essence, the person your world revolved around.

 

I'd look around, maybe see if there are any grief counseling and support groups in your area where you could get a bit of outside support from others struggling to cope - sometimes it helps just a little knowing you're not completely adrift and alone.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

I agree with all of what you're saying. I'm just kind of in a rut. I don't have many people left after our relationship took its course. I did let my life revolve around him because at the time I thought there would be no bad outcomes. (Don't we all) It's just TOUGH, the whole thing is very tough and I don't feel much like myself anymore.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

I agree with all of what you're saying. I'm just kind of in a rut. I don't have many people left after our relationship took its course. I did let my life revolve around him because at the time I thought there would be no bad outcomes. (Don't we all) It's just TOUGH, the whole thing is very tough and I don't feel much like myself anymore.

 

Yep, that's how most everyone feels after that situation, I certainly did. It just takes time to get yourself where you want to be. Just know you'll be okay.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Archived

This topic is now archived and is closed to further replies.

×
×
  • Create New...