Jump to content

New Years Resolution = Be Over My Exes


Recommended Posts

I had two real bad breakups this year, and I realized recently I haven't quite gotten over one of them and the other still lingers as well. The one I haven't gotten over yet, the last contact I had with her was at a bar in her hometown after she told me I was staying at her place for the night so she wanted to get me "blackout drunk" with her because she never saw me really drunk and then she changed her mind when both of us were drunk and told me I couldn't come home with her anymore. Long story short I ended up taking a cab home 35 minutes and the last time I talked to her was on the phone while we were both still drunk and it was very unpleasant. She is a mean drunk, she was arrested once for beating up her sister when they were both drunk, which is something you would never expect seeing her, I mean she is a dancer for a living. She blocked my FB that night while we were on the phone, I deleted her number when I hung up and told her to delete mine. You think after something like that it would be easy to move on but I've been hung up on her since then. I don't know if it's because I have so many unanswered questions about what happened that night that I would like to figure out, or if it is that the first month-two months I knew her, it was the most awesome time I've ever had with a person ever and I got a feeling around her that I never had gotten with someone before, just being around her made me blush and happy, or if it is because she was the most attractive person I've dated and I'm sure a lot of people would say I outkicked my coverage with her, but something about her makes me think about her time to time and consider trying to contact her again. It's been two months now and we haven't talked since, so we've both kept no contact going. I ran accross her twitter page the other day and it set me back a little bit, and then I texted her two days ago thinking her number was my friends number (long story, my phone broke and I was looking at my ATT call logs to look up old numbers and confused hers with his based on a date I remembered calling him) and luckily she didn't respond (the body of the text was obviously not for her so she must have figured it was a wrong #), both those things have been major setbacks though and have me thinking about her again.

 

The other girl I dated longer but it was longer ago, we actually brokeup towards the beginning of this year. We had a drawn out break up, I don't have ill feelings toward her but she was my first "serious" girlfriend. I didn't think we were on non-speaking terms and I actually caught up with her via texts a few months ago and she told me she had to quit work because of a medical issue, but wouldn't tell me what was wrong when I followed up. So I was a little worried about her, she had some issues, including suffering from depression towards the end of our relationship. She also had a rough upbringing and family life and dating her I really grew to care about her and respect her, so I was worried that there was something wrong with her. I tried following up about a month later with a text asking how she was doing and she never responded. I later found out she was dating another guy so I sent one more text telling her I know she is dating someone else and Im not trying to win her back or anything and that I was just hoping everything worked out ok with her and to make sure she was doing well and again she didn't respond. I took the hint and deleted her number and haven't spoken to her in a while either. Every now and then I think about her though and wonder how she is doing, and it's hard not to be reminded of her, because the place she used to work at is right on my route to work so I see it every day and it makes me think of her.

 

Anyway I am getting all my talking about them out of the way today because my new years resolution is that using them as a crutch is not helpful, living in the past and sulking is not helpful, that both were bad relationships and I am better off without both of these girls in my life and that it is time for me to MOVE ON. So starting January 1st, I will no longer speak about them, mention them and attempt not to even think about them again. It is time to move on to the future and building relationships that work and finding someone that is right for me instead of sulking about people who were wrong for me. On to bigger and better things!

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Happy New Year!

 

I think writing this out is very cathartic. I think this is a very healthy mindset you have, so good for you!

Hard as itis, stay off social media sites in the next few months....that in itself will help . Also, working out is amazing therapy. I call it the breakup body..lol. Nothing pushes you harder than thinking of an ex and what they'll be missing. Even if it's only in YOUR head, that's all that matters!

Best of luck!!

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Anyway I am getting all my talking about them out of the way today because my new years resolution is that using them as a crutch is not helpful, living in the past and sulking is not helpful, that both were bad relationships and I am better off without both of these girls in my life and that it is time for me to MOVE ON
Well the best intentions and all but this group will help you to keep that resolution, TheD87:

 

Alanon.

 

Books on codependency will also help you how to overcome.

 

Good luck and all the best to you in 2014

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Archived

This topic is now archived and is closed to further replies.

×
×
  • Create New...