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IS he attracted to me?


sophie416

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Hello world,

 

I'm really confused about this particular relationship I have with someone and I cannot confide in anyone about it.

 

I'll get straight to the point and I'd really appreciate your thoughts.

 

We live together along with others in the house. It's been about 1.5 years I think. We get on really well.

Ok, so what's making me start to think that he likes me, is about a week ago, he came home (let's call him Chris) drunk, which isn't out of the ordinary. He likes his booze and nights out with friends. It was about 1am in the morning and he heard me in my room watching TV. He comes in and sits on the bed and we're chatting. Then he starts to get touchy. I'm in my PJs, little shorts and a singlet and his hand is on my thigh. He starts to tickle me and we're laughing. He tries to push me but I resisted playfully. We watched Youtube together and he was lying next to me in my kingsingle bed, his hand was still on my thigh. Then he puts my arm around him on his chest as we're lying there and is holding my hand. This all sounds so affectionate!!! Then I get really tired and send him off to his room though he wanted to stay. That was the end of that.

 

A few nights later, when he was sober we were watching a movie in his room on his bed. We moved ever so slightly closer to each other as the movie went on. I went and got us a blanket at which point he patted me on the back. Movie ended, I turned everything off and he stroked my shoulder. As the night went on, he moved closer and closer and low and behold we were sleeping like a couple! Spooning, caressing, all of it.

 

We woke up, didn't talk about anything, acted like normal. Since that night he hasn't been at home in the evenings. Last night was his first night home since we fell asleep together. He asked me to watch a movie with him and I thought the same thing would happen. I couldn't have been more wrong! We were laughing and enjoying the film. I dozed off as it was ending. Then we both got up used the loo and I went back to his bedroom. He came in and just chuckled a little. I said "I really don't feel like moving, but I can if you want me too" to which his response was a mumble whilst he was organizing his desk. He put on another show and fell asleep. He didn't move closer. Never touched me, not my shoulder, nothing. Then, when the show ended and I saw he was asleep, I turned everything off and rolled over with my back to him, kind of waiting for him to move in. He moved further away! So I'm lying there wondering should I just move closer to him? So I did, little bit at a time. Then he rolled over so his back was towards me. I turned to face him. I desperately wanted to throw my arms around him! But the thought that he hadn't touched me all evening was making me think twice. So I edged closer and rested my arm along his back. My thigh was slightly touching him too. Nothing. After a while I stroked his back and turned to face the other way. Again, nothing. He didn't roll over to me. So, after another while I threw my blanket on him a bit and he moved further away a bit! I lay there and was feeling embarrassed and unwanted. So I sat up, covered him properly with the blanket and stroked his arm and left to my room. That was it.

 

He got up this morning, said hello cheerfully, and was on his way to Gosford for a family thing. I REALLY wanted to tell him I left because I felt I was intruding, that he didn't want me there, not because I didn't want to be there in a bid to draw him out about whether he's just using me as a convenience or whether he actually likes me.

 

Nothing! He left, won't be back tonight and I'm sitting here all confused and sad. I feel I like him. I want him to like me back. I don't know what's going on.

 

Was last night a rejection? Or wasn't I trying hard enough? I just thought that since we'd already fell asleep together it wouldn't have been like that. That he would have readily jumped in on the situation.

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If he really liked you, he would of reciprocated somewhat. The fact he was drunk was pretty much the reason he was all touchy and feel-y with you. I would leave it alone, try to get over it for the sake of your living situation, and seek out a guy that is as into you as you are to him.

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I feel he was filrty with you those cpl of times.. until he possibly met up with somone else, in which case.. after those few days away & where he returned and things seemed different.

 

I'd leave him be and like the other's mentioned.. i dont think you should be looking at him as a mate.. you're room mates and that should be it. Go any further and things will get complicated.

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  • 2 weeks later...

Thanks for the advice guys!!! Since the post it's certainly been a bit of a roller coaster, though the affection hasn't reached that level again. He's certainly been friendly and affectionate which has only given me a false hope. Then he'll drop comments with respect to chasing other women. I agree with all of

You!! We live together, and that complicates things. If he was genuinely interested he would still be pursuing me and actually respect my feelings and me!!! I've decided to take back the control and reinstate the boundaries. That way I'm letting him know, it's not okay to treat me like this. If you don't like me, then there are limits. Things will calm down and we'll be fine eventually.

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I don't think he is interested at all actually. It sounds like you are convenient for him ... a potential lay when he is drunk and someone to be around if he lonely and wants affection.

 

The biggest hint is that he is clearly chasing other girls. Come on now ... why would you even try to compete? He has given you no clear communication of interest because he likes things as they are. Stop hanging with him privately ... that is confusing you.

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