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hey,

i used to be very passionate and engaged person. i got into a bad relationship. i lost my goals and sense of myself from it. i got into another relationship right after. i was over the first guy but i didnt take the time to gather myself. my new relationship got messed up. he and i were engaged to marry. things were not going well between us... just arguments... and i was not assertive enough to tell that i m not prepared to marry. i didnt know it myself. i felt pressured into marrying from everybody. i wanted to do it too but it seemed i was not fully ready to take responsibility. on day of wedding, he and i had little argument, i was so sad on it thinking why r we this way on wedding day... my family saw me sad and asked whats wrong... it came out from my mouth that i need more time. he didnt receive this well... everyone in his family thought i was saying no. things got worse from there. its been 7 months, my boyfriend and i love each other very much. however he has all these judgments for me... like my words have no meaning, i m immature person, i want attention all the time... he and i r upfront abt it and said we have to resolve these issues. but i feel very unmotivated and depressed. it seems everything i do, he takes it negatively. its affecting my life too... i dont feel like doing much and my passion/interests r disappearing.

 

i dont know what to do.

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I think you ultimately need to realize what is the cause of the onset of your depression. It sounds like you have a toxic relationship with this man -- as soon as your passion for life and hobbies fade, you should know there is something wrong. Don't sacrifice yourself and your priorities for someone else. I have been in your same position and I know it is very hard. As far as I'm concerned, it sounds like he does not respect you or find your emotions valid. Further, does he know you are depressed? Can he tell? He should be doing something about it.

 

Just remember you're beautiful and made to spread light into others and the world and can not allow yourself to be held down.

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