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I know what I'm doing here. Thanks though.


BGstacks

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I know what I need to do. My girlfriend spews negativity like an ant queen droppin larvas, it's everywhere and it's disgusting. The little hate spawns are squirming all over my house, they follow me to work and they make my whole life smell of death and maggotry.

 

Everyone around me is always making comments like ... "Dude you're being followed by huge swarm of filthy negative maggots, can you please check yourself." I know that I'm speaking like this isn't bothering me but I'm just trying to make light of a dumpy situation which has become my life. Then the irony sets in and I realize that I chose to be here. I also chose to be here, posting on this website about a problem that I already know the answer to so let's just stick together and we'll make it through this as a team.

 

I'm feeling the downward force of misery, it feels like gravity but it only pulls on your skin and makes your eye sockets droopy, it's everywhere I look. I sit wallowing in my own misery and decide that I've become a worthless sad sack. I seek not attention, nor advice. I seek nothing but solace, freedom, something to get me away from here. Alas, I have the answer, unfortunately, it seems to be the one thing that is most rare these days; hard work.

 

We have a daughter involved and because of this I can't do things rushed and sloppy but that doesn't mean I get to postpone it forever. Raising a child under these conditions is unacceptable. She loves our daughter and reserves most of her negativity to myself, my friends, family and random strangers, so my daughter is left out of the bull. I need this happen in a way where I have my life in order. She has struggled to separate herself from her family back home in Burlington and holds a lot of resentment in her heart that we are in my hometown of London and therefore she will just head back that way when we split ways. This being said, I need my own vehicle beforehand because I would need to commute to pick-up my daughter but that's it.

 

I guess I just wanted to post to say what I plan on doing. I know that there are a lot of posts out there where people have similar situations to myself and I wanted to say that I fully understand. It's okay not to like people and it's okay to feel like you're trapped. It's okay because it's human to feel these things. I feel trapped right now, at home, at work, in life. It's okay though because I have the ability to get myself out of it. I care about girlfriend and I want her to figure out her , for the sake of our daughter, but that doesn't mean that I have to make her problems mine. She can write her own posts when she's ready, I'll be there for her in the future but it's okay for me accept that it's not healthy for me right now. It's okay to grow apart.

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You're damn right it is. Stand up for yourself and your daughter. She sounds like she needs to look in the mirror. To have an open and real look at herself. Perhaps it starts with a conversation with you. A gentle, non-antagonizing one, but that may be difficult because of her negativity. Good luck. Perhaps you can wait to hear responses here from strangers and show it to her?

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