Should I give him another shot?

[RuedeRivoli]

I met this guy online back in November and we got along fine. Nothing exceptional, but enough to make us want to see each other. We added each other on Facebook and all but that's when things started going south. I'm a pretty private person so when I do not know the person, I limit the amount of info they have access to. However, the guy started doubting I was actually real and kept telling me how fake I was. He even went on Google and made multiple background checks only to tell me how 'inconsistent' I supposedly sound. Mind you, everything I told him was true.

 

Anyway. I had enough of this person's doubts and paranoia, I decided to block him and never speak to him again. I also deleted my account.

 

Two days ago, I recreated an account and I get a message from him. Basically, he apologized about being a jerk and not realizing I was telling the truth. He told me it was only when I cut him off he realized I was real and honest.

 

I haven't responded yet, I'm not sure I want to. Should I give him another shot or just ignore him?

 

 

Thank you!

[browneyedgirl36]

Did you ever actually meet him?

 

Someone that paranoid either has major baggage OR is shady himself. I can understand doing a brief Google search on someone to see if they are who they say they are, but background checks? How extensively did he search? And accusing someone you barely know -- or don't know at all -- of being "fake," "inconsistent," etc. -- that's just odd. It sounds like he's pretty dramatic. Not something I'd want to deal with.

 

I vote for ignore.

[missmarple]

If he had been so paranoid before you even met each other, I don't think he deserves another shot. Sounds like he can become very annoying..and since it was nothing exceptional in the first place, why risk it?

[RuedeRivoli]

Nope, I actually asked him about when he wanted to meet up and I cut him off afterwards because his doubts got too annoying.

 

He checked me like 5 times on Linkedin, 6 times on Academia, 3 times on another professional website. He also checked my professional page ...

He checked these pages everyday the entire time we were talking.

 

He was like "It's weird to went to XYZ Uni but you said you grew up in X town, I don't get it" [...] He joked about me being a pedophile many times. It was just too strange. He thought it was weird I added him on FB when he's the one who requested I'd add him on it.

[chr8st8na]

I am a private person so if someone I was talking to did that to me, I would definitely cut him off. Also I think it is kind of odd you recreated an account and he was the 1st to send u a msg.... Isn't that border of stalkerish and creepy?

[browneyedgirl36]

Nope, I actually asked him about when he wanted to meet up and I cut him off afterwards because his doubts got too annoying.

 

He checked me like 5 times on Linkedin, 6 times on Academia, 3 times on another professional website. He also checked my professional page ...

He checked these pages everyday the entire time we were talking.

 

He was like "It's weird to went to XYZ Uni but you said you grew up in X town, I don't get it" [...] He joked about me being a pedophile many times. It was just too strange. He thought it was weird I added him on FB when he's the one who requested I'd add him on it.

 

Given all of this ^^^...do NOT give him another chance. Something's not right with him.

[LC8328]

I also vote for ignore.

 

He sounds like a drama queen. I have known many men like this, and they are very emotionally draining.

 

More often than not, they are not worth the trouble. Seriously.

 

Good luck!

[Batya33]

Do not interact with him anymore. Even if he deigns to believe you now his behavior was bizarre.

[annie24]

I vote NO!!!!!! keep blocking him. he's nuts.

[savignon]

This is not meant to sound snarky but why would you even consider giving him another chance??

[annie24]

^^^ Yeah, before I was a moderator, I remember posting something about some guy online but we hadn't even had a date yet, and already some problem arose. A then moderator, Mun, pointed out what a bad sign that is!!

[Ms Darcy]

ANNIE you weren't always a moderator? Lol.

 

Another strong vote for ignoring the creep.

[xaznbabyx]

ok this guy is a creep and I would never go out with someone like this... Even if you guys hit it off... this a red flag... I mean I understand that some people wants too look you up on facebook to see if they can find out more about you and maybe look you up on linkedin to see where you work and where you graduated... but to calls this a background check and calling you fake and inconsistent.. damn this guy is a creep and he has major paranoia.. Thats a turn off,I wouldnt respond to him...

[greta96]

No, no second chances for anybody who acts like this. If he does all this before he even met you, can you imagine what he'll do if you start dating and he becomes suspicious of friends you hang out with, coworkers you talk to, places you go without him... Just thank your lucky stars he did this now, before you even wasted your time to meet him, and not later when you'd already developed some feelings for him!

 

When I meet guys (on and offline), they only get to know my first name and eventually my cell number. Not my last name, not where I live, not where I work. I don't let any strangers have access to my personal info until I'm fairly certain they are normal, and that takes a looong time.