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How to beat a self defeating prophecy?


brokenhearted1

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So I've been dating someone for a little while, and things are going pretty well. We aren't moving too fast, and we aren't moving too slow. We've got along well thus far, and I realize I am starting to like him. I'm at the point where I feel like he could have the power to hurt me. Not the crushing takes months to get over it because we've been together for years, but that small sting of pain.

 

I find that I am starting to get scared and kind of waiting, and expecting things to go bad. I feel like eventually he will just want to stop talking to me, or find someone else. A lot of dating and relationships have gone bad for me in the past, and I guess I kind of feel at times that I can't win in that aspect. I haven't shared these thoughts with him or become obsessive...it's more of a sad feeling I keep inside. It's a self defeating prophecy, and I'm worried eventually it will cause problems.

 

We've even talked about taking steps forward together...but I can't shake the...stuff is going so well it's going to go wrong feeling. I was wondering if any of you can relate to what I am saying and if you've ever felt the same thing? Has anyone ever overcame these feelings and how?

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there's a close friend of my family who's some sort of a medium. she does tarot readings and some other psychic stuff, I never cared much to know more. either way, I was 17 and dating a fairly decent guy, my age and all. my mother wasn't very fond of him, but who cared, I was the one kissing him ¬¬.

 

one day my mother came home flustered with the news she got from that medium "your bf will cheat on you". I tried to downplay it, and pretend I didn't care, but it came to a point where I was so obsessed about it I barely slept. It got me to a point where I got so emotionally unstable, in a sense I think I concurred to the debacle of that relationship. and yes, I found out later he was actually cheating. took me years to recover, trust someone again, endure a relationship again, all that.

 

now I'm dating this other guy, one month into the rs. after the second week my mother called me "I was at aunt Sophie's, she did a reading and told me that there are many women in this guy's future. not just another, but many, many others. beware!". at first I was swept off my feet, felt like the ground would swallow me or something.

 

then I started counting, and I realized that if anyone did an accurate reading of my sexual future when I was younger, I could have been considered a potential . because there were many, many "others" in my life. and they all happened for a good reason, and we all parted for good reasons.

 

what I mean is: play the game as player two. see this story through his eyes. he's probably scarred by past relationships, possibly scared by this one as well. and then you'll realize that your fear has no reason to be.

 

if anything else, be sure: there will be others

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