What to make of this? Messaged crush from 4 years ago...

[heartxbroken]

In my last year of grad school (out of state) I had a crush on a classmate, but had a boyfriend at the time so I felt guilty and distanced myself from him. Thus, we were never really close nor hung out alone. I was browsing a online dating site which I do not have any profile picture on.. and I saw my crush's face pop up. I searched for him on facebook and decided to send a message in attempt to reconnect with him since he has moved to my town recently. Honestly, I am really unsure if he even remembers me. In my message I asked him to update me on his life to start the conversation going. He doesn't log onto facebook often and didn't even read my message until 3 days after I had sent it. His fb also does not have much activity either. 5 days after that he had friend requested me and I accepted. It has been nearly 2 weeks and he still has not replied to my message.

 

I feel since I had already put myself out there that I should not send another message. I deactivated my dating profile because I do not want him to find me on there and think I am stalking him. I assume maybe he has forgotten my message or not interested in reconnecting with old classmates???

 

I am not sure what to make of this...

[JJ2980]

You weren't friends. He doesn't know you well. He may have added you to his friends list but that doesn't make you instant buddies.

 

You'd be an acquaintance at best. Try not to get your hopes up.

[agatha]

I think you're loosing your time trying to spark up interest via fb when he clearly doesn't use it enough. does he live nearby? I'd suggest a catch-up cup of coffee, and go for real-life-xp.

[goodheartlady]

So he read your message? And no response?

 

Let it go - he is not interested.

[heartxbroken]

I think you're loosing your time trying to spark up interest via fb when he clearly doesn't use it enough. does he live nearby? I'd suggest a catch-up cup of coffee, and go for real-life-xp.

 

He is located about 20-30 minutes away. My intent was to reach out via fb and lead into meeting up as friends in person to catch up. I feel its pushy to send another message when my initial message has not even had a response.

[goodheartlady]

Yes, if a man is interested, he would have responded. Even if he is "maybe," he will respond out of curiosity. I would not push this - there is nothing more Unattractive to men than a pushy woman.

[agatha]

I see no harm in trying ONE more time. like saying "hey, I see you barely use fb, but since you're new in town, If you need help with anything, give me a call #phonenumberhere - happy new year!". and now you did ALL you could, and can just let it be. (and some men just don't know how to communicate via text, girls. that's just it)

[mhowe]

You were never friends...it was 4 years ago. I don't think he is at all interested.

I would push the contact...it will be stalkerish.