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Ex msgd- He wants to give me Christmas present today


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We broke up 2.5 months ago, only now have we had a week NC. His mum msged today asking if I would like to receive a gift from her. I said not right at the moment but maybe later. (I'm not coping very well) and now my ex msgs right after her to say 'I have a Christmas present for you and was wondering if its ok to give.' He says he understands if it's hard and to not feel bad for saying no if I don't want it.

 

For now I'm just ignoring it. I haven't bought him or his family presents because I'm not part of their family anymore.

 

Should I reply at all? I don't want to be rude but we haven't even gone a week NC yet arrrgh!

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Hey Heartbreak.

I think that was sweet of his Mum to want to give you a gift. Shows that she cares. Thats nice for you to know, even if you are unable to accept it at this time.

You will receive a few other gifts tomorrow yeah?

His gift, you dont need, or want. It'll confuse you, and be yet another reminder of him.

 

I haven't read your backstory, but if you were the one who requested time and space... he ignored that request.

Not replying isn't being impolite, it is sticking to what you requested.

 

I can place myself in your shoes, and yes it'd be extremely difficult to stay silent. But you have to consider the motivation behind the text and the giving of the gift. I do not think your ex is doing it for your benefit is he? Nah... its self serving.

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We broke up 2.5 months ago, only now have we had a week NC. His mum msged today asking if I would like to receive a gift from her. I said not right at the moment but maybe later. (I'm not coping very well) and now my ex msgs right after her to say 'I have a Christmas present for you and was wondering if its ok to give.' He says he understands if it's hard and to not feel bad for saying no if I don't want it.

 

For now I'm just ignoring it. I haven't bought him or his family presents because I'm not part of their family anymore.

 

Should I reply at all? I don't want to be rude but we haven't even gone a week NC yet arrrgh!

 

If you break NC, it will be even harder cope than it is. Just ignore it. You are worried about being rude but they are being rude by not considering your feelings. Nothing bad is going to happen if you do not accept their presents and if you still are thinking about it, think about this. I see you as a nice person and you said you haven't gotten them gifts so it's going to make you feel even worse for not getting them anything.

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Sweetie, your ex has totally played with your emotions -- breaking up, wanting to get back together, wanting to "just see how it goes", agreeing to date, cancelling the date, wanting "friendship"........ really, not surprised he'd blunder his way through the holidays, reaching out in a way designed to make HIM feel less lonely and less guilty, while completely ignoring how it makes YOU feel.

 

Ignore, ignore, ignore.

 

In fact, at this point you should consider changing your cell phone number so he can't send anymore breadcrumb texts -- and use you to electronically *hold his hand* through this breakup over the holidays... and after!

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