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Hey, I broke up with my Ex about 3 weeks ago, and have spent almost the past week in NC, which was after fighting to get her back, and being foolish. She has been rather stone cold since the break, I broke it first because I was feeling she didnt truly love me based on her actions. I tried to apologize and work it out but she walked clear other direction, and is using a guy who lives all the way accross the country as a rebound. I have been gaining acceptance and moving on though, slowly.

 

Three days ago I had a dream that we talked one more time and she told me she doesnt love me and wants this other guy and that she never wants to see me again. I woke up feeling bad, but accepted it was a just a dream, and nothing I didnt already know.

 

the next night I dreamt she updated her relationship status and was posting super lovey romantic stuff and other garbage, woke up from that feeling hurt and heart broken, but wasnt too bad yet, brushed it off.

 

This morning I woke up after a dream that he moved here into a house with her and she couldnt be happier and wanted to marry him. This one I cannot shake, I saw her and him kissing, like i was a fly on the wall.

 

This triple run on my heart has me feeling like day 1 again and really need this feeling to pass. I actually have a date tonight with a girl and want to be in a healthy place to have a good time and slowly get to know her.

 

So how can I master my dreams, and any advice for a new date? I've accepted the relationship as over and unsalvagable, she proved she wasn't the one for me, I am moving on best I can.

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Dreams about exes are totally normal. I dream about exes sometimes...you can't really master your dreams. What you can do is try to master your thoughts in that everytime you start thinking about her, actively replace it with cognitive self talk and redirection...use your conscious voice to say "okay, i don't want to think about this person, i have so much good in my life, let's not waste a moment...what should i have for dinner tonight?" I have a theory that over time if you use this strategy, it will start to seep into your dreams, and you can redirect your dreams as well. Use this well while preparing for your date so you can offer your full undivided attention and thought process to that person. Good luck!

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Its a dream, just random electrical impulses that a part of your brain tries to make sense of. It has nothing to do with anything and dont give your dreams a second thought or try to tag a meaning to them.

I once asked about a horrible dream I had and you know what someone told me? "It means you were sleeping" and I havent thought of a meaning of a dream since.

Odds are that you are thinking or you have her in your mind right when you go to bed, you either look at a picture or you read a text or email or something to trigger a memory. So quit thinking of her before you go to bed. If I play Battlefield before I go to bed you know what I dream of? Puppies...just kidding, its Battlefield. Of course if I look at Victoria Secret models I dont dream of them...hummm...

Anyway.. Dont think of your X before bed.

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Dreams are just that, dreams. If you don't like the dream on waking though you can close your eyes for a few minutes, simulate sleep and see if you picture a different outcome: one more satisfying, like you saying "Oh well," then driving away with a blonde in a red convertible who pulls up the ex's house. That sort of thing. It's an old technique I used back when I was stressed over a job to the point of having nightmares and all I can say is you'll feel sort of silly doing it until it works. You'll find you can shift your dream content to a more pleasant outcome many times.

 

Also it may just be your mind sort of setting you up and preparing you for that eventual loss. Maybe awake you aren't quite ready to let go, but your subconscious is screaming for you to move on already.

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