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Miscarriage after break up


goldfish box

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We dated for a year, broke up almost two weeks ago. I did not know I was pregnant until the miscarriage occurred. Does he deserve to know? I do feel like I should tell him since he was the father after all, but I also feel like it happened and it's over now. I am pretty devastated over this and unsure of how I feel about possibly telling him.

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I am sorry firstly xxx hope you are ok , there are afew of us on here who have lost babies , so if you need to talk it through .....we are here

 

I just don't know the answer to your question ...

 

do you want to tell him because you want his support ?

 

do you want to tell him because it is contact ?

 

I don't mean to be accusing you here , just trying to see where you are at . I am worried for you that if you tell him and he doesn't respond very well you are going to feel even more at a loss .

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I think it is good to truly examine your motives in doing so like star suggested.

 

I am worried for you that if you tell him and he doesn't respond very well you are going to feel even more at a loss .

 

This is a very good point. You are devastated(I am so sorry for your loss) and you should be as gentle with yourself as possible. If there is even an a teeny inkling that expressing it to him could make you feel worse, I would hold off on it for the time being.

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So sorry for your loss!

 

But I don`t think you should contact him. Did he break up with you? If so, are you sure you're not just looking for a reason to contact him, because you miss him and want him back?

There is no reason to contact him and tell him about the miscarriage. If it was him who broke it off, he made his choice - and that choice was to move on without you. Knowing about the miscarriage won't change his feelings for you. He may feel sorry for you and sad, but it won't make him want to be with you, at least not for the long run.

Also, if you're looking for support, I don't think a man who chose to leave you would be the best person to give it to you, even though he was the father.

 

Best course of action now is to work on healing yourself, and seek support from your family and friends.

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