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Help talking to girls and keeping conversations going?


QWERTY2386

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Hi, I am a 16 year old guy and I am in grade 11.

 

Through middle-school and high school my friends have always been in 'Relationships' while I am always the odd one out. In no way am I 'Desperate,' I mean, I won't ask out anything that wears a dress - In I way I just feel left out.

Because of this, my best friend and his girlfriend are committed to me getting one of my own. I have many female friends at my school, naturally some don't fancy me as a potential boyfriend, and friend-zone me however I am trying to meet people outside of my school. I figured one of the best ways to do this was at local shopping malls, if I mess up talking to anyone it is likely I will never see them again - so I figured it was a good place to start.

 

I told this to my friend and he rattled off two ways he and his girlfriend could set me up on a potential date.

They are, in his words;

 

"1, you take a photo of [his girlfriend] and I, being lovey dovey, and then I make a joke about you having one on your own and you make some witty reply showing your smart and most single girls have happy lovely couples so they are already on your side, then after your reply I will be like, "I can change that!" then I will turn to the 'target' and be like, "Excuse me, will you take a photo with my lonely friend here to stop his whining? I'll use my award winning smile and how can they say no with you being a lonely third smart wheel and my smile, they say yes and that's when you take over and introduce yourself and use you award winning smile and then confidence comes into play and we take the photo and you keep talking to her after and BAM I am a genius."

 

Sorry for the long thread, but if you're still reading - he sent me another one soon after.

 

"2, We have the usual conversation about you being alone and never had a girlfriend, we talk loud enough near the target so they have to hear and then I will say something like, "Dude, be proactive - meet a girl and talk to her not just complain!" And then you spin around and see her and pretend to just notice her and say excuse me what's your name, she says it and I say well this is my friend [me and I'm trying to get him to meet girls and smile and confidence and BAM.

 

I like the idea, but I don't know how to keep a conversation going in these instances... For example, in the first way he would ask a girl to take a photo with me. Where do I take it from there, introduce myself, ask her for her name? Where do I take it from there, my friends would have set up a photo op and not a conversation? The second one would probably be better but if she is with a group of girls do I just make my attention go to the one my friend introduced me to, or everyone?

 

Look, I know I'm just overthinking this but I'm just looking for some advice. Don't get me wrong, not having a girlfriend at 16 is not a massive issue. Never being in a relationship at 30 would be more of a problem.

If you're still reading this, cheers - any advice at all would be helpful.

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Oh dear, these are all terrible suggestions from your friend. No, no no...don't listen to him. Honestly (coming from a 24 year old woman, as I am) be yourself and don't try to chase after girls, or seek them out by saying that youv'e never had a girlfriend. Be yourself, do your thing (whether it's fencing, being part of a book club, painting, whatever) and there (maybe now, maybe 3 years from now) you will meet an awesome girl with like interests with whom you can have a meaningful relationship. That is my advice. I had relationships in high school and they were terrible. Typically, you meet the 'one' in college or adulthood. Teenage girls are moody, tricky, and do not know what they want. My advice is to become friends with a girl without expectation and something more may become of that

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