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Lost my wedding rings.....feeling pretty sad....


TattyK

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Hi

I just felt like venting a bit, I'm walking around trying to put on a "brave face" but really inside I am pretty devastated. Somehow I lost my wedding rings, I have no idea what happened. I usually take them off when I am doing dishes or making food with my hands, and put them on the ledge by the sink. I went to go put them on yesterday morning and they were not there. I checked a few other spots I take them off sometimes, on the bedside table, on the bathroom counter, nothing. I've checked everywhere I can think of, I keep going over it in my mind and I can't think of where they could possibly be. The sinks all have small holes in the grate, they wouldn't of been able to fall through. I've checked under all the couches, under the bed, etc. I thought what if they fell on the floor and the dog ate them, but there are lots of tiny things that end up on the floor in the course of the day and he never touches them. My husband mentioned that he cleaned the kitchen a few days ago but I can't imagine them being "swept up" in the cleaning and thrown away??

I just don't know what to think....I ended up going to bed early yesterday just so I could cry in private. I know they are just "things" and it doesn't mean we are not still married, but I'm still pretty upset. I mean, I got those on my wedding day, they are a symbol of my love and marriage, how could I just lose them like that?? I feel like an idiot, who does that?! We don't have the extra money to spend on something frivolous like my wedding rings, I just feel terrible. My family is going to eventually ask where my wedding ring is, how am I supposed to say "OH I lost it" without tearing up??

 

 

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No he rarely cleans anything, he usually does it if he's bored or if I'm angry and he is trying to make amends. And he wouldn't do that to me, he helped me look everywhere for them, he rubbed my back for me when I was upset before I went upstairs to cry. He told me it was okay and he isn't upset and he knows I feel bad about losing them but it doesn't make us any less married.

They're gone

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Did you ever get them out??

See I don't even know where mine went, my mind is racing with possibilities, I keep thinking the dog ate them and pooped them out at the park somewhere and I'll never know, or he swept them up when he was cleaning and through them in the garbage and now they're in the landfill somewhere, I just don't know....thats whats killing me the most, they could be here somewhere or they could just be gone forever....

Even if he bought me new ones, they still won't be my wedding rings. He knows I'm sad, but I don't think he really grasps just how bad I feel.

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I know it doesn't change anything, and I am trying to focus on the fact that its just a ring, but at the same time I loved my ring. It meant a lot to me....I just feel like I am missing something, and it cost a lot to just lose it is devastating and such a waste

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No. I never got it back . But I got a new set in 2009. I was sad though because I had worn my original ring for about 18 years.

 

So does that mean your ring is still in your walls somewhere???

I am glad you responded, you seem to understand that even though its just a ring its a really sad thing to have happen

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So does that mean your ring is still in your walls somewhere???

I am glad you responded, you seem to understand that even though its just a ring its a really sad thing to have happen

 

Yup. It is still in the wall of the house and I have moved since . I still own the house though. I was devastated when I lost it. My husband bought it as a 20-year-old University student. It had so much sentimental value for me. But it is something you do get over.

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Hmm, try a small trick I do sometimes when I lose something. Sit down, relax in a place where you won't have anyone or anything pulling your attention away. Go to the moment you discovered them gone then try to mentally walk backwards from that moment to the events of the day and back to where you last remember having them. Try to recall at anything you did that day, anything no matter how small. Repeat several times if need be since often times the mind will pull up more and more detail as you go over something. You might well discover something like you had them in your hand, went to place something in a drawer and there they were etc. Even if you recall nothing at the moment sometimes it starts the mind to solving the problem and you may remember something a day or two later even.

 

If no one other than you or your husband was in the house, if they can't fall down the drain, if someone couldn't have quickly stepped inside and snatched them before running out, then chances they are still in your house somewhere just misplaced. Because your normal habit is to place the rings in their usual spot when you wash dishes or prepare food that may be what you're remember, it becomes sort of a mental habit. But then you deviate from your usual pattern only don't remember doing so. Anyways try that, I once lost my car keys at the office and thought I'd have to spend the night there since I couldn't lock up and go home. I finally did that exercise and found the keys in a file cabinet. I had them in my hand ready to go home when I went to put a file away, the phone rang, and apparently I dropped them into the file then closed the cabinet to walk away and answer the phone.

 

Try it and see if it helps. Inside your house is far better than what I did, leaving my wedding band in the pocket of my jeans that I took to my local laundromat. There was no getting that band back, so my ex had me design another wedding ring and he got it to me for our anniversary.

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I am so so sorry to read this. I know how it feels to think you have lost something of great emotional importance to you. I haven't lost my wedding ring, but this year when my husband and I put up the Christmas tree I thought I had lost my baby bulb which each member of my family has (and has had since we were born). It meant a lot to me as it was part of the family tradition and made us all feel like we had a "place". I was so upset that I tore the house apart looking for it. My husband did his best to console me but I honestly felt helpless and sad and angry. I know it's just a "thing" but sometimes that "thing" can be incredibly important emotionally.

 

I sincerely hope you find it. I know how devastated you must feel.

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When was the last time you wore the ring? have a look in all the nooks and crannies of the kitchen or clean it up again. Or just look where you last wore it thoroughly. Could be underneath a dresser or microwave, or refrigerator. You might still find it somewhere.

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Just an update, I had the day off today so I took it upon myself to turn the house upside down, I turned the couches upside down and checked inside of them, under the fridge, in all the pantries and around and behind the T.V. I had given up, and when I was tidying my dogs kennel I found them!!!!!!!!!! I have no freaking idea how they ended up there I think the dog got them and brought them into his kennel for some reason?? I am just shocked he didn't eat them, he put them under his blanket its just so crazy I am SSOOO happy I found them my stupid stupid DOG!

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Just an update, I had the day off today so I took it upon myself to turn the house upside down, I turned the couches upside down and checked inside of them, under the fridge, in all the pantries and around and behind the T.V. I had given up, and when I was tidying my dogs kennel I found them!!!!!!!!!! I have no freaking idea how they ended up there I think the dog got them and brought them into his kennel for some reason?? I am just shocked he didn't eat them, he put them under his blanket its just so crazy I am SSOOO happy I found them my stupid stupid DOG!

 

Oh what wonderful news!! Maybe don't remove them anymore -I wear mine when I do dishes, etc (or maybe wear gloves?)

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I don't take mine off either . Or if you have to take them off put them directly into a jewelry box. That is what my mother-in-law does with her engagement ring because she only wears it when she leaves the house. She wears her wedding band all the time but not her engagement ring that sits in her jewelry box until she leaves the house. Then when she returns home again it goes back in the box.

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OH I don't think I will be taking them off again for a good, LONG, while!

I am so unbelievably relieved I can't believe I found them!! I secretly thought my husband accidentally threw them away when he was cleaning but I didn't want to make him feel bad so I tried to envision any other possible scenario! He probably just knocked them off the ledge when he was cleaning, and then the dog found them and brought them into his kennel! I know he brings his toys and spare socks into there, I don't know why he would pick up my rings but hey what a good dog for not swallowing them!!!

I am going to put them on my necklace if I have to take them off from now on, that way I will always know where they are

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