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The where we stand question


imtriguy2010

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Background - Been seeing a girl for just under two months now. We have had a fantastic time every time we've gone out. With the exception of the first week and last week, we have gone out as least twice a week. She asked if I wanted to go to a concert with her in Feb and had even talked about other stuff later in the year. I am totally cool with this. Here's the thing, it seems like I have been the one initiating most of our daily conversations which is different than things had been in the past. Yesterday, I decided to give her a chance to contact me first but didn't get it. I finally broke down around 2pm and texted her (she hates talking on the phone). She responded not long after and we exchanged a few texts and after a couple hours, she mentioned that she was afraid that I was upset with her because I took so long to get in touch with her because she had to cancel on me the night before. I told her I completely understood (a coworker's brother passed away) and she should have gone to be with her. Then she mentioned she that she was really looking forward to our plans. Anyway, I've met her coworkers, she's met people where I work, etc. I just feel like I want to know where we stand. Should I see if she wants to spend a little more time together instead? I mentioned it jokingly by saying "if you really think that, then you obviously don't know me very well and you should spend a little more time with me." Her response was "oh geez, what a chore!" Should I just let it go? Should I ask her what she's thinking? Thanks

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It sounds like things have been going quite well for you two thus far! I'd just straight up ask her where you two stand. Many girls (including myself), wait for the guy to initiate that type of conversation. She could very well be happy and excited that you brought up the topic! Don't let this relationship go. She's into you from what I gather..

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Thanks for all of the responses. It sounds like telling her is the way to go. I don't think I have ever been needy with her and that was my main concern. I didn't want her to get that feeling. I've read so many things about time frames and exclusivity and most are anywhere from 3 - 6 months. To me what seems more important is how much time you've spent together as opposed to how long you've been seeing each other. I'm taking her out for her birthday on Thursday. I assume that would NOT be the time to ask in case she really isn't interested in exclusivity. I would hate to ruin that for her. On the other hand it could make her night if it's what she wanted. Be safe and wait?

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I've read so many things about time frames and exclusivity and most are anywhere from 3 - 6 months.

 

Everyone has his own time frame. In the past, I've wanted to be exclusive with some guys after 3 dates..and with some others after 2 months. Everything is relative. Ask for what you want and don't worry about time frames and stuff. Ask her on her birthday, it could be the perfect gift.

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