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Ex texted me today out of nowhere


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well like i said in previous threads...i've gone about a month NC with my ex who broke up with me for the 4th time in April and she texted me today out of nowhere making it her first initiated contact with me pretty much since we've been talking on and off since July...it's basically a "i miss you and the things we had" text...saying that it's days like this when shes stuck up in Milwaukee with her family (we both live in the chicago land area) that i miss you and the just even the little things we had, and how much it really sucks that we can't be in each others lives, ect...at first i thought it was hopeless to hear from her herself anytime soon, but that text completely caught me off guard...didn't even know if she still had my phone number or not!

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i already texted back...i told her i missed her and everything too, that today she couldnt help but text me, even though she knew she shouldn't have...i even questioned what made her text me today and thats basically what she told me...she said she had to get back to work and apologized that she didnt know if she was thinking clearly with texting me that today...i said she doesn't have to act like she committed a crime, its just that i'm assuming shes still unwilling to try again and i don't want to be told to move on after we're done talking today like all the other more recent times we talked...this is basically the first initiated contact from her in the 8 months we've been apart!

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She probably did miss you that's why she texted. Though it's more partially due to wanting an ego boost, partially due to loneliness and boredom and cos she was curious as to how you were.

 

You should have ignored her, since she repeatedly broke up with you and all. However, I can understand why you texted back. Emotions are quite hard to control.

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In the future don't text her back. Do you want someone who misses you just when they feel lonely? Or do you want someone who just misses you? Think about this and remember that these texts don't really mean anything when it's built off of loneliness. If she truly missed you, she'd be putting in more effort to be in your life right now.

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Craziness! You girls are like "clairvoyants", she texted him saying she missed him, and right away you say she's bateing him. How is it so clear? If my ex texted me that I would have totally bought it! Sheer genius!

 

Sorry you're going through this OP. Sucks big time.

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Did you miss the part that said "Too bad we can't be in each others lives"???

 

Just because you are in denial about your relationship does not give you the license to spread false hope. As you can see...or not...this post is in the Healing after Break up forum.

 

Hence the advice on how to heal.

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Craziness! You girls are like "clairvoyants", she texted him saying she missed him, and right away you say she's bateing him. How is it so clear? If my ex texted me that I would have totally bought it! Sheer genius!

 

Sorry you're going through this OP. Sucks big time.

 

Someone breaks 4 times with you, suddenly messages you out of the blue and you buy it?

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You notice how the majority of contact is through the written word (text). What happen to the good ole days when people actually picked up the phone and called! This would eliminate a lot of the confusion as to what did they mean when they said......... you would be able to tell what they meant.

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well the evening we came to an agreement that we'd give it a fresh/slow start before jumping into anything officially again like the last times, and things were great the past few days but last night she told me she talked to her mom about this and her mom apparently gave her some "good points" and that we'd only be making it worse on ourselves in the long run, and i guess she agrees, so that was that, she changed her mind after one discussion with her mom....i know very well that this was a very real possibility, and even told her to tell me if she has second thoughts about it, but i guess i never realized how upset and kinda angry it'd make me if she did end up having second thought...i've sent her a few texts since last night giving my feelings and thoughts, about the situation, why i really think she texted me the other day, her intentions, ect, but she never replied...so i messaged her on facebook and asked if shes just not going to respond and she said "better that way Anthony, bye."...i wondered if it was because she just doesn't care and she replied with "comeee on..." and left it at that....i really don't understand her at times, or why i put as much effort into things with her anymore as i do...i guess its because i still love her, miss her, really was hoping this new approach would work, still care, ect....i guess i kinda blame myself, idk

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In the future don't text her back. Do you want someone who misses you just when they feel lonely? Or do you want someone who just misses you? Think about this and remember that these texts don't really mean anything when it's built off of loneliness. If she truly missed you, she'd be putting in more effort to be in your life right now.

 

Wow, that is just spot on. Good response. You want someone who wants you as much as you want them. All the time. Not on their terms, when they're lonely. You're right.

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You notice how the majority of contact is through the written word (text). What happen to the good ole days when people actually picked up the phone and called! This would eliminate a lot of the confusion as to what did they mean when they said......... you would be able to tell what they meant.

 

There's this thing called Caller ID haha kinda ruins it because they generally know who's callin!

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