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It got very violent last night.


MissyMxxx

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Me and my boyfriend have not been getting on since the birth of our child 3 months ago. Were both 27. He lives with his mum i live with mine. We have been arguing non stop about moving out getting our own place he just doesnt seem interested. Last week we got into a argument he started punching the sofa ended up bruising all his hand which he blamed me for. Mid way through the week as we had been arguing he picked our baby up i threw some money at him as he had previously called me ungreatful because he took me out for my birthday, he got out of the car started pushing me around n started punching his car. We made up a few days later. Last night i went out had about 3 drinks n went back to his house. Ended up having a argument over what were doing at christmas n it got really out of control he was screaming at me that i was a c**t im this im that i pushed him cus i was getting angry at what he was saying he pinned me to the bed had his hand round my neck, i got up slapped him in his chest, he grabbed me again through me to the floor i banged my head really hard so i got up n slapped him accross the face twice he kept getting in my face ready to punch me fists ready but he didnt. Told me i better not be here in the morning. His mum came down he was making me look like the bad one telling her i was drunk, a physcho, how ive slapped him for no reason im this im that, so i got up pushed him again n told him to stop lying! Now cus i pushed him infront of his mum i look like the bad one. Granted i lost it last night too i shouldn't of slapped him accross the face or pushed him i hate violence but he was calling me every name under the sun n pinned me down i just lost it. Everytime we argue he gets his mum involved n makes out he hasnt done anything. The main thing we argue about is moving out. Cant go on like this now hes "finished" me because ive slapped him what about what he did to me now i just look like a idiot. Everytime we argue aswell he tells me he hates me he ends the relationship calls me all names under the sun then after a while of begging him not to leave me he comes back. I need to end this relationship but how am i supposed to do it while we have to see eachother as theres a baby involved. I love my baby and i dont want her growing up seeing her mum n dad arguing all the time. I feel depressed i feel guilty for slapping him n i feel upset at the family i really wanted is gone no living together just separate lives now how can i sort myself out n be happy again for my baby?

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This isn't a healthy or safe environment for you, your boyfriend or your baby.

 

It's time to either seek relationship counselling/anger management for you both or it's time to end it.

 

You can keep a civil relationship so that your child can see both of it's parents but that doesn't mean you have to stay with someone when the relationship becomes abusive.

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OK, in volatile situations like this, you both need to take a BIG step back and not see each other for a long time. And you need to get a clear head, and recognize that you will NOT have a positive living experience with a man where you are going at these all out brawls with each other and you're not even living together yet. Sad to say, you did procreate and have a child, but something is very wrong with this relationship and it could be dangerous to you, him, and your baby, and it needs to stop.

 

So I suggest you immediately table the idea of living together and just focus on yourself and your baby. You need to contact someone to get a child support payment plan set up to get support from him, and also to set up visitation so that he can see his daughter, but as far as trying to be a couple, I think that is not appropriate considering what has happened, unless you both agree to go to counseling to fix this.

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