wierd situation with LDR 'EX'

[ptw1972]

o i split up with my ex ldr partner- 5 weeks ago now!, despite that we have talked every day..and seen each other almost every weekend (we split over distance)

 

It looks like i have found work there now ( i have a crucial interview in 3 weeks, which was delayed due to holidays), and we are gonna be back together when i get the job (ill move straight in with her then a month later we are going to get somewhere bigger together).

 

The last two weekends we have spent the weekend together and we shared a bed, we have carried on with the cuddles and hand holding while together ( we spent the whole weekend cuddled up).. but with some boundaries we agreed together (no kissing or sex basically and wearing some clothes in bed etc)

 

This last weekend - things just happened, we were cuddled up in bed, i started playing with her thigh the way i used to when we were a couple - and when i realized what i was doing i apologized but.. she told me not to stop... so u can guess where it led from there.

 

When i left we broke our other rules with a long long kiss as well

 

Yet im still 'single' until i get a job, and we wont be spending xmas day or new year together..this was my idea, and its right.. exes dont spend those days together

 

And as a guy..i should be happy that im getting sexual stuff etc right?.

And i should be happy that we will be together if the interview goes well

 

Im not.. if anything, this 'together but not a couple yet' stuff is thoroughly depressing me. And im dreading xmas day and new year.

 

I am not worried about her meeting someone else, not worried she will change her mind- i just miss her more i guess.

 

How do those who wont be with their LDR get through xmas?

 

And do you think maybee seeing each other weekly is causing more harm than good?.

 

Or carry on seeing each other perhaps, but i sleep on the couch so that we dont slip?

 

I love the time together, but it makes it harder- she said she finds it hard too and wants to kiss / do other stuff when we see each other, but that she wont go back into an LDR again so we arent going to be 'together' until i get the job.

 

On the other hand i dont want distance to build up between us.

 

It all feels so...odd right now. Surely your either together or your not, and this 'halfway house' thing is messing me up a bit i think.

 

Thanks

[pippy longstocking]

just to be clear

 

if you get the job you will move in together and be a couple , but if you don't then you stay broken up ?

[ptw1972]

just to be clear

 

if you get the job you will move in together and be a couple , but if you don't then you stay broken up ?

 

Basically yeah, although its not all hinged on one job.. i have other applications lined up.