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Meeting a girl from online in 5 hours. Very nervous. Help!


DaveDreamer

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Hi,

 

So me and this girl are meeting in person tonight after chit-chatting online for a little while. This girl is really confident. She is so active and has a great social life. And has plans to travel. And i even said to her "do you ever get upset or dislike some things" and she was like "no im very happy with life". This scares me. I feel inferior. I am not such a loud and over confident person. I have my moments but all in all im going through a rough patch of my life which is what bought me to the online scene in the first place.

 

I dont have a car. I dont have a huge group of friends. I work long hours and don't have many hobbies. I have managed to make her intested enough in me to want to meet me but even when i said should we go for food she was like "how but just a coffee". so she is taking a strong lead.

 

Im meeting her in 5 hours. I just want to be me.. but sometimes i feel like me is nothing to be that proud of.

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Being confident is something you can learn! Like the old saying.....you can "fake it 'til you make it." Being confident is not the same as being loud, or superior/inferior!

 

Despite your current 'rough spot' (I'm in one as well, financially, and it bites...) you are still an intelligent and interesting person. No need to share your rough spot with her tonight (not that you would) just go to meet a new friend, have a coffee, some conversation, minimize the pressure you're putting on yourself!

 

Be yourself, but.....try to be the best version of yourself. Not fake....but hopeful. Because I do believe you'll get through your current rough patch. "This too, shall pass..." Be positive, warm, friendly and open. Just be in the moment if you can.

 

And please post afterward!!! I do wish you the best!

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Enjoy your meeting tonight and have fun! Be confident and keep the conversation flowing. This is a time to get to know her, so ask questions and see if she's your type. Remember, ultimately it comes down to compatibility, so don't put so much pressure on yourself. You might find her physically attractive and she might be attracted to you as well, but if the chemistry isn't there, that's out of your control. Just enjoy it and put your best foot forward. If you're confident and happy within yourself, it will show; and that alone is a very attractive quality in a man. Have fun, and remember...don't be so hard on yourself! I'm sure you have more to offer than you're giving yourself credit for.

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Thank you both for your kind words and i will post what happens after. But as far as being "Happy in myself" .. thats the problem. if i was i dont think i'd be nervours. i dont even know what im doing trying to meet girls. I got out of a relationship back in july and still jaded by it and this is all out of some kind of desperation to find a companion. As you can kind of see.. i have a defeated atitude.

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When talking online and getting ready to meet, everyone puts their best foot forward. Of course she has been upset in her life and must dislike something, but people want to portray themselves as happy when getting ready to meet a potential date. Sure, she likely is very confident and happy most of the time, but she's human just like you. Just have fun meeting a happy, confident person. If she doesn't dislike much, she's likely to see the good in you, not any negative qualities you might have.

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