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Ex contacts me I want her back but I am in a new relationship?


Chris591

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Me and my ex girlfriend of 2 years broke up 2 months ago.

 

I guess i was a force dumper when we broke up since she's been acting cold and distance like she doesn't care anymore before I end it's like she's just waiting for me to do it since she doesn't wanna do it.

 

After a week when we broke up I told her I do love her and I wanted to work things out between us. She then rejected me and said she wanted to be by her own and doesn't want any relationship and doesn't wanna go on anymore..

 

So during this past 2 months we are No Contact She started contacting me few days ago via Email... Her number is blocked and I removed her in facebook so only in email she can contact... We are long distance at the moment as I move backed to US when we broke up. She is in Europe.

 

I recently have a new girlfriend. Nothing really serious with this new girl but I think my ex know I have a new gf probably our common friends told her..

 

I want my ex back but How do I approach this situation?? Do I respond? Do I end first with the new girl??

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First off, the new girl doesn't sound like she's an "official girlfriend" since you just started dating her and you say it's not serious. So do the right thing and just tell her she's great, but you aren't over your ex and need time to heal and get a resolution on that relationship one way or another. So you are off the table for dating and wish her the best then go NC on her.

 

Which is what you should have done in the first place instead of rush off into another relationship.

 

As to the ex, well if it were me I'd hold off on that. You both broke up and now you are in a completely different country and she only starts contacting you when she realizes you're moving on. Either address why you broke up in the first place and fix it and one or the other of you go there or leave it alone.

 

Whatever you do, let the new girl go before you start back in on the ex or now you're just using new girl and that's not cool. So let her go, then deal with the ex and decide what you want to do. And if the ex and you don't end up getting back together then hold off on dating for awhile and don't contact the new girl to keep playing games. Or anyone else for that matter. I'd give it a good solid four months at least. Otherwise this could turn into a very messy game of push-me/pull-ya that ends up getting other people needlessly involved and hurt.

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what has your ex said that makes you think she wants you back? she basically told you to get lost. I'd see what she has to see before you take any serious actions.

 

You're obviously trying to move on and are seeing someone new. I would keep on doing what you're doing and see what your ex says. You havent done anything wrong by reading an email from your ex.

 

I don't know, Im looking for a new gf, but if my ex contacts me, I have 3.5 years of history with her to at least hear what she has to say. What I choose to do with that information really depends on what she says and how I feel about it. In the meantime I'm keen on finding the right woman for me, whether that by someone new or my ex. your old relationship is dead, so if she contacts you it would be under new terms.

 

Maybe I could put it this way. If some "smoking hot, girl of your dreams" walks up and starts talking to you, are you going to run away because you have a girlfriend? I wouldnt think so... If you have respect for your girlfriend you obviously wouldnt flirt or sleep with her, but it's not like talking to her is going to make you a total jerk.

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Neither of you are over your exes and are only going to end up hurting any woman who's unlucky enough to become involved with either one of you!

 

I don't understand why you don't simply go looking for one night stands -- or some FWB -- why deceive someone who likes you enough to want to be your girlfriend?? Doesn't that seem a bit CRUEL to you?

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