Jump to content

Well it's a full on relationship now, kind of freaked out..


Casmut

Recommended Posts

I've been kind of posting about this in the dating section, but I think my gf and I are beyond that now.

 

Quick background, we met about 3 months ago. Things were amazing from the start, and still are as I type this. Before this happened I was REALLY enjoying single life, yet she somehow managed to ninja me and yeah we've been strong since. Since the day we met we've been planning all these things, spend a great deal of time together but it was only recently where our relationship jumped to the next level. I met her parents a few weeks back, they really like me and even invited to a Holiday dinner. With that said I spent this entire weekend with her starting from Friday evening, she ended up staying at my place and well eventually met my Family, everything went really well, my family really digs her.

 

Anyway that being said, today I started feeling a little drained from spending the entire weekend with her. Kinda started to miss my freedom of single life, although she has mentioned that she hopes I'm not ditching my friends to spend time with her, which I am not. I thoroughly enjoy my time with her. Heck I think I might even love her, I dunno. She certainly loves me even though it hasn't been said. She has kinda tried to say it but not directly. I've told her things like "I really really like the way you giggle.", she responds with "the giggles are full of love, and they love you". Soo I usually don't respond to that sorta thing, not sure how to react. Bleh getting off track, I'm super exhausted and have barely slept. Today I started to miss single life, I dunno just miss slothing around and doing whatever I want. Kinda feel like we've spent a lot of time together recently, which is fine but maybe I'm drained a bit and a tad freaked out that it's reached this point so quickly.

 

Also sometimes I feel my confidence take a dive like I am not good enough for her. Things are so good with her that they are way to good to be true.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Maybe you're sabotaging if you feel on some level it's too good to be true...?

At some point it's normal to progress to a whole weekend together and if that remains stifling perhaps you're not done with the single life yet. Give it a little more time and be honest if you have to let this go.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Don't start overanalysing things. It sounds like you two get along really well, and that is great.

Maybe you need a little more alone time though?

Maybe a night or 2 to sit in your pjs & watch crappy tv?? I have to have this time as well.

Have you suggested this to her?

Link to comment
Share on other sites

HI casmut

 

I think it is only natural to feel a little closed in when things get intense, like you said , single life , you can sloth around doing your thing in your own space and own head ... but that is not a problem ... you make sure that it isn't every weekend , you go at a pace that suits you both , and carry on enjoying your alone time when you need it .

 

as for this

 

Also sometimes I feel my confidence take a dive like I am not good enough for her. Things are so good with her that they are way to good to be true.

 

this is where many people go wrong in life ..statements like that , or "I wont get that job" or " I know I will always be poor " etc etc ..you get back what you put out , it is the law of the universe , so if your saying it is too good to be true then you can't complain if that happens ..so change your mind set ... nothing is to good to be true ..things are good because you are entitled to feel joy and happiness , nobody is better than anyone else and nobody is more deserving of a better being ..we are all equal and we are all deserving of happiness .

Link to comment
Share on other sites

What do you mean by "the single life?" I do not quite get it. What exactly are you missing?

 

What would it take for you to love someone? Why do you think that you are not good enough for her?

 

Sorry for all the questions. I am just curious.

 

I guess I miss my me time. Although this feeling is probably coming from the fact that I just spent the last 3 days with her. I don't know what it takes for me to love someone, but my gf definitely has many positive qualities that may make me feel that way towards her. Sometimes I'm at a loss of words, I have a hard time expressing my emotions properly. She seems to be able to do so smoothly, but not over do it. I usually don't have an issue talking or being social, but expressing myself has always been difficult.

 

Savignon: As for me sabotaging it, its far from that. I wouldn't want that at all. But you're right, need to give it more time.

 

Shooting Star: I really like how you put that, thank you for that

 

I usually have alone time all week, well I am working but I only really hang out with my gf on weekends. Rarely do we hang during the week.

 

Thanks all for the replies. I think right now I'm just a little taxed out from spending the whole weekend with her. I'm sure I'll feel different about it in a few days.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Could be that you're rushing things a bit fast as you try to adjust to being involved again.

See how this next week goes.. as you're probably tired & stressed a bit, like you said from the weekend, as you're not used to this sort of thing- as you've been living it up, as single for a good while and got used to that.

 

IF things get to be a bit too much, you could suggest maybe you two visit once thru the week and one day on the weekend for a while.

Is is always healthy to keep up with your own life as you had it before, we should never change everything according to our partners.

Always make time for YOU, your friends etc. Doesn't mean you don't care for her..just an understanding should be in order and respect.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Do you have a fear of committment? If yes, why? Are you insecure? Why do you sometimes feel not good enough for her?

 

you need to work on that. Insecurity is like a disease in a relationship. Insecure people crave attention, think the grass is always greener, sometimes cheat, lie, sleep around, never happy with what they have got till its gone etc etc

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Archived

This topic is now archived and is closed to further replies.

×
×
  • Create New...