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Ex contacted me. Rush of feelings


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Hey all, been posting on here on and off for the past couple of months. Been helpful in my recovery from a bad breakup. My ex and I had a rough go at things, we loved each other but the relationship was very toxic and she ended up overlapping me and broke it off with me after 4 years to be with another man. A week few weeks after she has kicked me to the curb, she was already engaged to this guy. It was bad burn obviously and one that I've been recovering from through a number of different outlets.

 

Tonight i went out with some buddies, got dinner and drinks then hung out. Came home and checked my email to find some rather cryptic messages from my ex. No real greeting or anything, just saying how she felt like an idiot, saying text or email her back if I want and the weirdest part saying I know you found someone new if not let me know...I feel sick

 

The last one was just strange to me. Why would a woman who wanted me so badly gone to be with another be saying this stuff? Makes no sense. I almost feel like its a drunk email or something. Anyways the biggest concern I have is for the past few weeks I've been pretty good about moving forward. The instance I saw this mail,though its like all come rushing back to me emotionally. I feel she's lured me back into a web of crap.

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It sounds like she's having problems with this other guy and wants to check to see if you're still available as a possible Plan B option, just in case.

 

If her intention was to get back together, she wouldn't bother with vague or cryptic messages -- she'd be telling you how sorry she is and asking to talk and letting you know she wants to get back together.

 

I would just ignore the emails. If she has something meaningful to say, she'll find a way to say it. Seeing as she cheated on you and dumped you for the other guy, I wouldn't make it so easy for her to get a reply.

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I know what I'm suppose to do, or not suppose to,do in this case. I guess I find it funny cause, being dumped one wants questions answered that sometimes are never answered. I did the worst thing when she broke up with me, I begged to talk to her instead of just walking away like a man and respecting it, now I get this weird message. Sharky you are pretty on in saying if she wanted to,contact me for real ( no cryptic statements) she could, I almost feel like its a test to see if I can still be an emotional piece of,driftwood or life raft. Just very strange, and is be lying if I wasn't curious what a,respond would bring.

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You're exactly right -- it IS a test.

 

She's testing you to see if you're still available as a possible option, just in case.

 

I can certainly understand how hard it is to resist the temptation to reply..... but I can tell you that usually, when people reply to these types of breadcrumbs, the ex simply disappears again (having gotten the answer that yes, you're still available as an option if they so desire to use you as such.)

 

TRY not to reply. Why give her the ego strokes? She cheated on you, she doesn't deserve to get a response so easily.

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  • 3 weeks later...

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