Advice on how to approach a second date.

[mmaturen]

Hello there people, Last week I had lunch with a girl I once shares an acting class with, and im really looking forward to see her again. We have had seldom chats over whatsapp, and I got invited yesterday to a film premier on Thursday night, so I wrote to ask her if she would like to come. She has a previous commitment and she can´t go. So I ended the chat with “If you feel like having lunch this week let me know” sort of the ball is in her court now.

My question is, shall I just leave it like that? I mean perhaps she won’t ask me for lunch just yet because it may be to forward of her….

But then I don’t want o come out to pushy having just said you tell me when, and the go and ask her out…..

[missmarple]

Yes, leave it like that. If you invite her again after you've told her to let you know, it will come accross as desperate. If she's interested in you, she'll let you know. It's not forward at all since you were the one who invited her both to the film premier and for lunch. Actually, it's a good way to know if she's interested without looking pushy. The ball is in her court, as you said.

[emma34]

That sounds so casual. If you wanted to have lunch with her, you should have just asked. Like how is she supposed to know that you like her? Honestly, I would follow up...but be direct...say 'i'd like to take you out...'

[DancingFool]

That sounds so casual. If you wanted to have lunch with her, you should have just asked. Like how is she supposed to know that you like her? Honestly, I would follow up...but be direct...say 'i'd like to take you out...'

 

^This. A not quite an actual invitation for lunch? That wouldn't even begin to clue me in that you are interested in me. It's more like hey, if you are bored and feel like hanging out give me a shout....mmm....yeah....won't be hearing from me.....

 

Follow up, be direct and ask for a date. If she is still busy and doesn't tell you when she is free, then she is not interested. Right now, she may not have a clue about your intentions and most women will not call you for lunch.

[mmaturen]

Thanks now that you put it on under that light it makes sense the question is how long should I wait to ask her so as to not sound insecure or desperate given that I told her to call me?