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looked at my exs facebook


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today i logged on to facebook today and went to my ex boyfriend page. and saw a couple of pictures of him and his new girlfriend and a couple of post saying how grateful he was to her for helping him get through "all this trouble" it kinda set me back not too much. It still hurts that he cheated and left me for her and that my ex are playing house with my son with his new gf. i guess you can say im jealous at the fact that he was able to move on so fast and that i was so replaceable. and im still dealing with the break up. i miss what we had and the family that i used to have.

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BLOCK HIM now -- don't just *unfriend*, don't just *delete* -- but block him on Facebook!!

 

You don't need even one more second of this grief. You don't need to see pictures of them together and you don't need to see his messages to her. Of course it sets you back! I can't imagine how painful that must be.

 

Block him on Facebook and all other social media. Stalking your ex online is proven to make it harder for you to move on!! Read this:

 

Have you gone No Contact, or are you still in contact with him? It's time to cut contact. That includes online contact.

 

Here's a guide that will help you: www.breakuprecoveryguide.com

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were on low contact we only contact each other when its about our son. yeah i know i regret going on to facebook and looking at his profile. it was a dumb mistake but for the last month ive been having this feeling of that hope that he was gonna come back so i kinda did it to get rid of that feeling if that makes sense.

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Sorry to hear that. You need to stay off his profile. Anything you see in there is liable to hurt you. Plus, what you saw in there is what he wants other people to think. Not necessarilly what the reality is. You are not replaceable. Nobody is. Because we are all unique. Right now, he is probably going through a honeymoon period with her. He is using her to fill the void that was left when he chose to let you go. You haven't got someone filling that void, that is why you feel so bad. However, that is not necessarily a good thing for him in the longterm. Whatever crappy things he did to you, he will probably do to her once their honeymoon period is over. Because he didn't give himself any time to assess the mistakes HE made in your relationship. This means that he has a great chance to repeat them.

 

You on the other hand have the opportunity to reflect on your own mistakes and therefore not to repeat them. This means that you have the chance to become a better person and attract a better person next time. He is a cheater who is living with someone who is ok with cheating. Sounds to me that they both deserve eachother and that none of them would be considered a person of quality.

 

You have suffered a loss, much like a death. I am very sorry for your loss. Mourn the death of your relationship and once you are ready, please accept it and let go. The fact that he was blind to your value, does not mean that he was right. Your value is not related to how other people treat you -especially cheaters! Cheaters are weak individuals, and too shortsighted to see your value. If nothing else, how he treated you speaks volumes about HIS value. Please go no contact from now on and focus on yourself and your life. Whatever he does is no reflection of you. His cheating on the other hand speaks volumes of who he is. You lost nobody special. Focus on healing and on taking care of your child. Things WILL get better in time. Best of luck to you!

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thank you your right, lately ive been feeling better its just that some day i feel down and lonely especial since the holidays are around the corner and yes the past couple of months i have been able to reflect on the mistakes i have made. is it normal to feel shame and guilt after this realization? im no longer mad anymore i don't have anger towards him just a little bitter about the whole thing. i feel like im at the halfway point of getting over him

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If you have a child together, you need to keep all contact and communication ONLY about your son -- nothing else.

 

So, you can go ahead and BLOCK him from Facebook now, right? That part of his world is none of your business and will only bring you pain. Believe me, I understand how much it hurts to know someone you love is moving on with someone else.

 

Check out the guide in the link I posted, it was written by a fellow member here. It will help you.

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Before I become an user on this forum, I used to look at different threads and I came accross this little splee made by someone that I saved on a word doc whenever I needed a pick me up (I don't have the user's name so I'm sorry for whoever did actually say this because I am not taking credit for it! Just thought it would help you in your social media dilemma)

 

“Just remember that Facebook is a projection of a life, not the actual life. You can see what a person types , not what is actually going on, or what they are thinking. When we are trying to heal it is probably one of the worst things we can look at. “

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