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advice on girl


dereitis

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This girl i've been "talking" to has been confusing lately. We hooked up a couple months ago pretty regularly (no sex). We kind of stopped doing that but we've kissed a few times recently and she's danced with me at clubs and so fourth (all within the past week) We text quite frequently and all of her friends apparently really like me. She can be very touchy some times and we tend to laugh a lot when we get together. In the early stages of me meeting her I told her we are JUST FRIENDS. On more than one occasion.. I have developed a liking for her but am not sure where to take it. I don't actually know if I want anything serious right now but I really enjoy her company.

 

There's one problem though. She's extremely flirtatious with other guys. When we hang out, she will be showing me a lot of interest and then flirting pretty hard with other guys, including my friends. She loves the attention. I've seen her hold hands with guys while they talk to her. Generally this comes from drinking... I haven't seen her do anything of this sort when sober.

 

When I call her on the phone she is very sweet to me and talks to me like a girlfriend would, but she is very hot and cold. I was at her house a few days ago with friends and she was showing a lot of interest. When talking about going back to my house she sounded interested; however, when I finally after a few hours asked her what she was going to do she said "I'm going to stay here" and seemed rude like she didn't care if I was there or not. (I wasn't bugging her) Are these just games to get me to chase or is she sticking pretty diligently to the "friends" rule I created?

 

I know I should obviously say something to her but I really don't want an awkward reaction and I don't know if I'm in it for a full boat relationship right now (if she responded well) I like the idea of a little fling and having fun. Just wondering if you guys think she's in to me or I just shouldn't bother? I do understand I put her as a friend in the beginning so don't point out the obvious. I'm just trying to decide if since we show each other a lot of affection when we're together and kiss every now and then that it may be something she's into as well.

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You like the idea of a 'little fling' but you find it a problem that she flirts with other guys. You told her you want to be just friends but you wonder if she's into you. You don't know if you want a relationship but you expect us to guess what she wants.

 

No offence, but how old are you?

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I suggest you don't go any further with this, being a 'friendship'. Leave it at that. YOu've pointed out some negatives about her, which Im sure YOU don't need.

 

One fact

>> " she is very hot and cold"

This should show you that she is NOT comfortable with you....

Maybe she is just 'one big flirt' and nothing to see of any further than that- Not gf material. I'd leave her as only a friend.

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I'm not really sure what you want from her. You basically told her she's just a hookup (Just friends) and not girlfriend material. She probably likes you in some ways but resents you for the "just friends" thing. Thus the hot and cold.

 

If you want more, ask for more. Otherwise, this is the way it is.

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